Skip to main content

My Brother's Funeral

By Carl S

On June 16, my oldest brother died (at 84). My wife and I started packing that day, traveling 800 miles in 2 days for the viewing and next day funeral. It was a return to the northeast corner of Ohio and Catholic country; a different culture, in a way.

Now there are those who will argue that a culture must include its religion, but I disagree. I can see a New Orleans jazz funeral sans religion, Corpus Christi without Christi. Such has been the case in Scandinavian countries. Northeast Ohio has not learned this.

My siblings and I were raised Catholic. Our births were stretched out over quite a few years. I was the fourth of five, and by the time my younger brother arrived, the religious influence was not as strong. The oldest of us became very Catholic. Suffice it to say what kind of funeral I expected. My younger and only remaining brother and I were pallbearers. We carried the casket the long haul down to the front of the contemporary and stylish church. I was instructed to take the first pew, the others to follow. I went down to the end and exited down the next aisle and into the outside hall. My wife asked me to at least sit in the back row. I told her, “I don’t want to be any part of this,” and, “Someone has to protest for the children” (this being a cause especially sensitive for me), though I knew they would not make a connection. Meanwhile, the mass continued; the “cracker worship,” one might say.

I walked the vestibule, the hall leading off to adjoining rooms, and studied the posters (“Is God in your marriage?” I wrote, “No!” on that). Half an hour later, my brother joined me, telling me he was tired of, “Kneel, stand, sit,” and that he had been sitting through it all.

The service went on, small choirs singing with the congregation, the organ booming. We delivered the casket to the waiting hearse. He would be cremated.

Today is the day after and I think I should share my atheist thoughts arising from this experience, some of which can be said in short form: the viewing of the departed has become not so somber anymore, as I remembered it to be, but a social function bordering on an extended family party. The poem on the cards printed for the deceased was much more of a humanist statement than a religious one.

But I came to the conclusion, as a result of being an outsider standing outside in the hall, that those within had suspended (perhaps “abandoned” would be a better term) thinking; sheep to their pastor (which, after all, means “shepherd”). But something more occurred. There is a connection between what was taking place within the church and what happened outside whenever I tried to have a dialog with them on their beliefs for, at some point, their minds “entered the church,” they abandoned logic and all thinking, repeating the words, say-after-me-style, that they heard inside. Believers think they are open-minded individuals. I, and others who are not believers, find the opposite to be true.

Believers are in a kind of post-hypnotic state, reacting unawares to key words, phrases, instructions, as if still under the influence of hypnosis. Let me posit for your consideration that church-goers are mesmerized. Any of us who have witnessed a hypnotist’s exhibition is aware of what a “post-hypnotic suggestion” is. Believers are in a kind of post-hypnotic state, reacting unawares to key words, phrases, instructions, as if still under the influence of hypnosis. Something has been accessed to hijack the normal reasoning processes. And it has been accomplished via social forces, sometimes.

I have carried with others the remains of my brother, along with our memories of him, what he was to us and not what he was to himself. What he did for us, his loving, laughter, tears, sexuality, his progeny. No one seemed to mourn his dying as one does in a tragedy. He lived life fully. Like him, there will be no “me” ever again.



We arrived home yesterday and in the evening watched the last TV installment of The Tudors, concerning Henry the 8th. Bishop Gardiner, in his zealotry to restore Catholicism to England, drew up accusations declaring the Queen a heretic, which carried a death sentence. (He had already been responsible for the torture and burning of a woman heretic.)

Later, after the program ended, I had an angry shout because I’d left my vitamins behind and would not be “bothered” by a discussion with my wife on where they might be. Later on I realized that this was just the last straw, that my anger was misplaced, for the real cause was the example in the TV program of how far a religion will go to preserve itself – even to destroying the innocent merely for disagreeing.

I remember grade schools which taught about Christian martyrs, who died for the faith. Funny, they never taught us about those who were killed for going against the faith. And what did those persecutors, crusaders, and killers prove about the truths of their faiths? (Other than when a religion is in power it corrupts, and when it has absolute power it corrupts absolutely.) Faiths prove nothing and are contrary to the reality of the natural world.

Simply put, the martyrs “for the faith” are those who gave their lives to support the irrational claims of those they trusted and believed. So it will ever be.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Christian TV presenter reads out Star Wars plot as story of salvation

An email prankster tricked the host of a Christian TV show into reading out the plots of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Star Wars in the belief they were stories of personal salvation. The unsuspecting host read out most of the opening rap to The Fresh Prince, a 1990s US sitcom starring Will Smith , apparently unaware that it was not a genuine testimony of faith. The prankster had slightly adapted the lyrics but the references to a misspent youth playing basketball in West Philadelphia would have been instantly familiar to most viewers. The lines read out by the DJ included: "One day a couple of guys who were up to no good starting making trouble in my living area. I ended up getting into a fight, which terrified my mother." The presenter on Genesis TV , a British Christian channel, eventually realised that he was being pranked and cut the story short – only to move on to another spoof email based on the plot of the Star Wars films. It began: &quo

Are You an Atheist Success Story?

By Avangelism Project ~ F acts don’t spread. Stories do. It’s how (good) marketing works, it’s how elections (unfortunately) are won and lost, and it’s how (all) religion spreads. Proselytization isn’t accomplished with better arguments. It’s accomplished with better stories and it’s time we atheists catch up. It’s not like atheists don’t love a good story. Head over to the atheist reddit and take a look if you don’t believe me. We’re all over stories painting religion in a bad light. Nothing wrong with that, but we ignore the value of a story or a testimonial when we’re dealing with Christians. We can’t be so proud to argue the semantics of whether atheism is a belief or deconversion is actually proselytization. When we become more interested in defining our terms than in affecting people, we’ve relegated ourselves to irrelevance preferring to be smug in our minority, but semantically correct, nonbelief. Results Determine Reality The thing is when we opt to bury our

So Just How Dumb Were Jesus’ Disciples? The Resurrection, Part VII.

By Robert Conner ~ T he first mention of Jesus’ resurrection comes from a letter written by Paul of Tarsus. Paul appears to have had no interest whatsoever in the “historical” Jesus: “even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, we know him so no longer.” ( 2 Corinthians 5:16 ) Paul’s surviving letters never once mention any of Jesus’ many exorcisms and healings, the raising of Lazarus, or Jesus’ virgin birth, and barely allude to Jesus’ teaching. For Paul, Jesus only gets interesting after he’s dead, but even here Paul’s attention to detail is sketchy at best. For instance, Paul says Jesus “was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures” ( 1 Corinthians 15:4 ), but there are no scriptures that foretell the Jewish Messiah would at long last appear only to die at the hands of Gentiles, much less that the Messiah would then be raised from the dead after three days. After his miraculous conversion on the road to Damascus—an event Paul never mentions in his lette

ACTS OF GOD

By David Andrew Dugle ~   S ettle down now children, here's the story from the Book of David called The Parable of the Bent Cross. In the land Southeast of Eden –  Eden, Minnesota that is – between two rivers called the Big Miami and the Little Miami, in the name of Saint Gertrude there was once built a church. Here next to it was also built a fine parochial school. The congregation thrived and after a multitude of years, a new, bigger church was erected, well made with clean straight lines and a high steeple topped with a tall, thin cross of gold. The faithful felt proud, but now very low was their money. Their Sunday offerings and school fees did not suffice. Anon, they decided to raise money in an unclean way. One fine summer day the faithful erected tents in the chariot lot between the two buildings. In the tents they set up all manner of games – ring toss, bingo, little mechanical racing horses and roulette wheels – then all who lived in the land between the two rivers we

Morality is not a Good Argument for Christianity

By austinrohm ~ I wrote this article as I was deconverting in my own head: I never talked with anyone about it, but it was a letter I wrote as if I was writing to all the Christians in my life who constantly brought up how morality was the best argument for Christianity. No Christian has read this so far, but it is written from the point of view of a frustrated closeted atheist whose only outlet was organizing his thoughts on the keyboard. A common phrase used with non-Christians is: “Well without God, there isn’t a foundation of morality. If God is not real, then you could go around killing and raping.” There are a few things which must be addressed. 1. Show me objective morality. Define it and show me an example. Different Christians have different moral standards depending on how they interpret the Bible. Often times, they will just find what they believe, then go back into scripture and find a way to validate it. Conversely, many feel a particular action is not

I can fix ignorance; I can't fix stupid!

By Bob O ~ I 'm an atheist and a 52-year veteran of public education. I need not tell anyone the problems associated with having to "duck" the "Which church do you belong to?" with my students and their parents. Once told by a parent that they would rather have a queer for their sons' teacher than an atheist! Spent HOURS going to the restroom right when prayers were performed: before assemblies, sports banquets, "Christmas Programs", awards assemblies, etc... Told everyone that I had a bladder problem. And "yes" it was a copout to many of you, but the old adage (yes, it's religious) accept what you can't change, change that which you can and accept the strength to know the difference! No need arguing that which you will never change. Enough of that. What I'd like to impart is my simple family chemistry. My wife is a Baptist - raised in a Baptist Orphanage (whole stories there) and is a believer. She did not know my religi