If Bible-god Could Change

By Carl S ~

If Bible-god could change his mind, what changes might he make?

1. As a parent he wouldn't allow his children to feel responsible for all the chaos they experience in life, and for the deaths, poisons, and destruction inherent in Nature.

2. He would forbid those who claim to speak in his name from exploiting emotions, through hammering at those emotions with all manner of confusing and conflicting demands attributed to him.

3. He would not play favorites, telling some they are much better than others and therefore have the right to dominate, denigrate, snub, persecute, jail and execute whomsoever they say he hates.

4. This god would encourage humans to think for themselves and never take his word for anything on faith. He'd want them to think freely and become independently mature.

5. He'd tell those intelligent creatures: Wisdom is attained in doubting and searching after the facts continually.

6. He would say, "Please, no praise or worship. Save your praise for one another. Don't spend your time, money, and labor on me. I'm completely happy with myself."

7. A caring deity would not allow his creations to torture nor be tortured by others. And, by an example, he would never torture them.

8. A deity who gave a damn would admit he makes colossal mistakes with the human race (if not what the mistakes are), and will be good enough to apologize and sympathize because, let's face it, he has no experience of what it is to be human.

9. He would make clear a hatred of the religions of prejudice and the promotion of ignorance, fears, hatreds and holy wars, since they have done more harm than good.

10. If he cared at all, he would tell humankind that uncertainty is not to be rejected; that only death is absolutely certain, for which there is no insurance against its finality. In no uncertain terms he'd say: You have one guarantee to one life; live it fully.

All of these things a deity would do if he cared - but cannot. Because you see, the deity we speak of here is the Abrahamic God: yesterday, today, and the same forever, and can't be any different from what he was made to be. There is neither progress nor hope with this "God." Since he doesn't do any of these things at all, obviously he doesn't give a shit.

Addiction

By Stef ~

Hi, I'm Stefanie and I'm addicted to religion.

I have seen others refer to this as an addiction, and I have said this myself before. Sometimes I wonder, am I making to much of this? Is it just something that happened in the past and I'm over it? No.. It's something I battle all the time. Am I sure all other ex Christians feel addicted? No, I don't know...

That's just it, I don't know....

I have been in a relationship with someone who goes to AA. I go to support him, And I listen. I have to say that I went through a lot that they did, but I can't tell them that, they will never understand. Its actually addicting to me to get into an organization. But I am an extremist and take it too far. I can't help it and I don't know when to quit, I end up getting hurt and hurting the people around me. Christianity hurt me and my family. I didn't know when to quit. I had to be just what God ordered and I thought I was doing right. If I hurt you for the cause... I was doing right, or so I thought. I lost everything in his name, and I would do it again and again, and I would have died for this god as well. I gave him my money when I was going without food. I was supposed to have faith. I ended up stealing food and then believed I was going to hell for it. There was no mercy. But I couldn't stop.

I guess it comes from a lifetime of not having acceptance. Never belonging and never being wanted. Then you find out that this guy in the sky loves you, wants you and you will do anything to get there. Again I was in a community of christians that were hateful, mean and uncaring. But I was so sure that doing things as needed would get me where I should be. I turned the other cheek to those who thought they were perfect and went to my knees hoping god saw my obedience. And I actually became a mean person myself without even knowing it. But I needed to belong, I needed to be okay. And I was the furthest from it and just didn't know it.

I just kept losing myself and always thinking that if I do what he wants, he will save me, he will do whats right. So many nights I spent on my knees. So many days I would go without food just to pray, I would cry. I would find something else wrong with me to apologize for -- just so he could forgive me -- and maybe now I might be good enough for him to have mercy on. No? I would find something else.. I turned on myself, Even though I was not abusive to my children, I would become strict, expecting perfectness out of them. I would scare my son with how the demons were coming for us, that we have to be right with god... I was sure any good I did was god through me, never that I was actually a good person. I was ready to accept that anything bad was who I was, that's what I was left with...

I had become this pitiful shadow of a person trying to become..... loved...

Something I was now convinced that I didn't deserve.

Hi, I'm Stefanie and I'm addicted to religion.It took a lot for me to realize what a mess my life was. And how much of a mess my life always was. And, that obviously no god was going to save me. I was so angry and had so much hate when I realized how my kids and I had been ruined all because of this religion. How much our lives would have been different without it. The three abusive marriages I got myself into all in the name of religion. The years of abuse, brainwashing, and praying.... praying because I thought god would get me out of this since he loved me so much. A myth...

But...

Over the years, over the time... Over understanding... I moved from hate and anger, and I found other ways to handle my past. I still get upset when I look back, but I am no longer filled with the hate I once had. It took a lot of time and work and years to get to this point.

Now came the realization...

I some how feel a need to belong. Not a normal need. Its so easy to somehow fall back into a religion setting. And I don't know why. Like how an abused wife goes back to her abuser, or an alcoholic goes back to the bottle... I know that they have groups that deal with this, as its explained that once you have been into a cult, its very easy to fall back into another one. Maybe the need to have a leader? Or still the need to belong and be loved? I don't know...

But I do know that secretly I have to be careful about getting into religion, into beliefs that show no proof. And even if it does, can I trust that? Its always there. Always feeling that push.... and I'm always running for dear life from any temptation... I've made it this far, I'm not going back.

The tree in the Garden of Eden

By Karen Garst, The Faithless Feminist ~

And the LORD God planted a garden in Eden, in the east; and there he put the man whom he had formed. And out of the ground the LORD God made to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food, the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. (Genesis 2:8-9)

And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden; but God said, `You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.'” But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate; and she also gave some to her husband, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves aprons. (Genesis 2:2-7)

So what is the backstory on what happens in these passages? Did the Hebrews create this story out of whole cloth or was there a similar story in other cultures with which they would have come in contact? And what was the purpose of this story in Genesis?

Let’s start with the tales of the Sumerians. The Sumerian civilization was the first literate civilization. Early evidence of their civilization from approximately 3,500 BCE predates any reference to Hebrews or Israelites in the region by over 2,000 years. Because the Sumerians and subsequently the Akkadians and the Babylonians ruled over large stretches of the Middle East, its history, culture, and stories were known throughout the region. In addition, the Hebrews were exiled in Babylonia for four decades in 587 BCE.

The location of many cities of the Sumerians was in the desert, much of present day Iraq. Thus, it is not unusual that their myths attributed great powers to water and the vegetation it could provide. (You can read the original Sumerian myth here.) For example, Enki, one of the early gods of the Sumerians, was believed to have lived in a place near an aquifer and was called the “Sweet Waters God.” He lived in Dilmun, “the pure clean and bright land of the living, the garden of the Great Gods and Earthly paradise, located eastward in Eden.”

Ninhursag was a female goddess, perhaps serving alone prior to her sacred marriage to Enki. In the story, she feels the waters of Enki within her and asks him to tend to her earthly body and provide waters for it. He responds willingly and creates waters and streams which allow great vegetation to grow. She leaves for the winter to prepare for the spring and all it brings to the earth.

Unfortunately, Enki gets a bit carried away with the young goddesses that he and Ninhursag have created. When Ninhursag returns she advises these young goddesses to stay clear of Enki. She tells one of them, Uttu, who is disappointed that Enki no longer cares for her, to take the seed of Enki (read sperm) and plant them in the ground. From these eight seeds all the plants of the earth grow. She also tells Uttu to remember that all relationships of love should be reciprocal. I can’t help but wonder if this would have been the mythology I had grown up with rather than the Bible which treats all women as property. Wouldn’t it have been nice to have a strong compassionate woman goddess as a model versus an angry misogynist male god?

When these plants grow, he eats the eight plants, one of which is a “tree plant,” and becomes ill. Ninhursag, the ever faithful wife, comes to the rescue and cures Enki. It is when he complains of his eighth pain, that of his rib, that she responds with the incantation “to the goddess Ninti, the Lady of the Rib and the One who makes Live, I have given birth for you to set your rib free.” What is interesting here is the fact that the Sumerian word “ti” means both “rib” and “life.” In Genesis, the word Eve means life but the Hebrew word for rib is different, thus missing the pun in the Sumerian version.

Once he is cured, he is stronger than ever and kisses his beloved Ninhursag. He realizes it is Ninhursag that he truly loves and they live happily ever after.

While they are many similarities to the Genesis story just in this myth, there are other associations that are just as important. In many ancient cultures, the mother goddess, who was worshipped prior to and then in conjunction with male deities in a pantheon, was associated with a serpent. This serpent was the symbol of “rebirth, rejuvenation, rebirth, healing as well as service and wisdom.” In some Mesopotamian art, this goddess is portrayed with a female body and the head of a serpent.

What is significant in the worship of female goddesses was the association with nature. This divine female was seen as both bringing forth life and taking life back to its womb, the earth, upon death. The tree, with its roots in the ground and its branches above symbolized this cycle of birth from the earth and return to the earth upon death. In the Old Testament, the word Asherah, stands both for the Canaanite goddess of the same name and the pillar or tree where she was worshipped in nature. In this aspect, she is similar to all the previous earth goddesses in many cultures.

The transformation of the role of the tree of life in Genesis is significant because it is the symbol of the goddess turned on its head. Instead of representing both life and death in an endless cycle, the tree brings upon mankind its destruction. God is now the creator and the symbol for the goddess, the tree, accompanied by the serpent, becomes the path for sin. To no one’s surprise, the woman, Eve, becomes the first of mankind tempted by the fruit of this tree.

You can read another post I have written about Eve here and here is another post about the influence of Babylonia.

http://faithlessfeminist.com/women-in-the-bible/the-garden-of-eden/

The Election, My Conservative Family, and Biting My Tongue

By Thomasina Belle ~

I know a lot of you can probably relate to me, so I'm going to use this platform to vent. I really really appreciate this site. I am the lone liberal ex-christian in my large devout conservative family. I am the “donkey” in a room full of elephants yet I am the “elephant in the room.” With our election over and my anger somewhat subsiding, I just need some fellow ex-Christians to share the love. I have friends who think like me philosophically, but not many who have a similar background.

The following is a perfect vignette to illustrate my family and me: A couple of years ago with my parents and two of my siblings, we got on the subject of gay marriage. I try, I really try to keep my mouth shut, but this time immediately after my dad said “it’s in the Bible!” I blurted out “The bible’s full of contradictions.” You see, I had been reading some Bart Ehrman and Skeptics Annotated prior to that and was well on my journey to agnosticism. My sister cried, “Katie! You can’t say that!” You would have thought I had just shouted “Kill and eat all the babies within a mile radius!” I felt dirty and alone. I have kept my mouth shut ever since.

The bible is absolutely worshipped by my family as God’s perfect and holy word. It is a magical book. My retired mother listens to it with her earbuds while she busies herself around the house. It is her way of “growing in the Lord” and resisting temptation. Devotions are had every morning with coffee. Prayers are said aloud for everything; meals, car trips long and short, stressful situations and unreasonable and/or unsaved people. The ritualism and superstition is undeniable, but because they are ex-Catholics, they would vehemently deny this.

This election. This unbelievable maddening shocking presidential election. Donald Trump could be a serial killer, rapist, cannibal, an extra-terrestrial, a cross-dresser, half-monkey or maybe even GAY! Doesn’t matter. He is a Republican, therefore representing the pro-life platform, so my family voted for him. Plus he just got saved, right?! He’s a babe in the faith, newly born-again (gag).

I love my family. My sisters and I have a great relationship, yet the great sadness of my life is that they are still blind to the truth and I don’t see a change for them anytime soon. Constant Facebook posts of Bible verses and Christian music videos and warm fuzzy stories about God working in lives. And of course, they see me as blind to the truth, having “strayed” from the faith.

Global warming. Virtually all scientists agree that we are destroying the livability of our planet, but that doesn’t matter because “This world is not my home, I’m just passing through. My treasures are laid up somewhere beyond the blue.” I was reading yesterday that the great Noam Chomsky stated that the Republican Party is “the most dangerous organization in world history” because of their denial of manmade climate change. Trump supposedly plans to scrap the United States’ ratification of the Paris Agreement on climate change. Arghh!

Okay, that’s my venting for now. Some might call it a miracle that my family and I get along so well. I call it me nodding my head in person and saying uh-huh on the phone and biting my tongue.

Telling You What You Already Know

By Carl S ~

Believers find something wrong with unbelievers: If you don't believe, they'll tell you, it's because you have chosen not to. (By the way, what's wrong with that?) They all maintain belief is necessary for morality. So let's rethink this unbelief thing. Unbelief is as necessary for believers as belief. I maintain, along with Eric Hoffer, that it takes an incredible amount of unbelief to make belief possible. In fact, much more unbelief than belief is involved. You have to constantly disbelieve the evidence, the realities of life that keep contradicting those beliefs. The contradictions in the various creeds alone create suppressed undealt-with doubts within them. This has always been true. You might say about this, "Tell me something I don't know." Or maybe right now, you don't see things that way; if not, you soon might.

Sometimes the obvious takes a long, long, time to be recognized. Speaking of important discoveries and proposed theories, one observer noted that the majority of them were met with instant rejection. (Some things, like gay rights and climate change are still being dis-believed; again, mostly by believers.) Things change. Over time, they become accepted. Later still, they are "obvious," and most experts who rejected them will claim they knew all along they're true. Only rigid fundamentalists are entrenched in disbelief. They're still failing to mature, blindly believing just as their ancient revered predecessors they emulate did. They go to church in modern cars, while maintaining oxcart morality is superior to all others. And the rest of society is supposed to respect their beliefs?

Faiths claim the beliefs are "obvious." After all, if there is a god, he can do anything; hence, miracles contradicting the laws of nature. Anything goes. But - that's "if" there is a god and if that god is the one they choose. From all available evidence, who needs a god? "God" fed people in the desert for 40 years with bread, told people to stone to death disobedient sons and homosexuals, and even brought a man like "Jesus" back from the dead, back in those oxcart-morality days. Believe it or go to hell. And unbelieve anyone who tells you differently.

We enjoy solving problems. Sometimes, what's "obvious from the start" turns out not to be. "Let the buyer beware," is an ancient adage. The more serious our subject(s) are, the more so shall we investigate them. That's why there are spies and private investigators, for example. You'd think a person who's concerned about being tortured forever simply for not believing something would investigate whether that claim is true. You would think that common sense naturally tells you that if the payoff on a heavenly insurance policy is immaterial, so then should the payments be immaterial. The more important the claim is, the more, not the less, it should be investigated.

There was an old crime case, a real one, on TV. A woman called 911 to report her husband committed suicide. When the EMT's arrived, she said she and the children had come home from a breakfast/shopping trip. She called for her husband, who slept downstairs, and went to find him dead, having killed himself with a revolver. She explained he had a history of attempted suicides. Cut and dried, case closed, right?

Let the buyer bewareSuicide? The EMT's didn't find the gun. She explained that it was bloody, so she wiped it clean, and put it on top of the refrigerator, to keep it away from the kids. Sure enough, that's where it was. When the police arrived, they found he had been shot twice in the head. Questioning the wife, she gave conflicting stories of the time-line leading up to her finding the body. She repeated the part about going out, but added that she called down to him before they left the house. Forensics revealed he had already been shot at that time.

Does anybody shoot themselves twice? Yes, if they graze themselves on the first shot. This was not the case here. Both wounds were direct ones. Further investigation revealed she had purchased the gun days prior. She said her husband and the kids were in the car when she was buying in the gun shop. The CCTV outside the shop showed her car was empty at that time. When confronted with the evidence, the wife said: Okay, this is what really happened. I came home and he was there bleeding, and he told me, "I want to die. Shoot me." And so, she said, she (mercifully) did. These words were her defense in a plea deal to get a mild sentence. True, he was still alive when she arrived home. Also true was the fact that she then scanned her computer to find what to do when the first shot did not end a life. Bottom line, the judge found her admission of shooting him, and other evidence, enough to put her away for 65 years.

The higher the stakes, the more elaborate the "explaining away" a murder, theft, swindle, etc. When someone tries to sell you a bill of goods, be wary. The greater the cost, the more serious the commitment involved, the more the claims must be investigated. It is not like falling in love, as one woman said, involving, "I know in my heart that I have a relationship with Jesus just as sure as I have with you. I just don't question this." I understand feelings, but she can touch, see, hear and even taste me. I'm for real real. She, like you and me, can surely fall in and out of love, sometimes with heart-wrenching results. We don't investigate the person we fall in love with, but we ought to if this involves getting involved with "Jesus." The stakes are high, once you start down that path. The evidence does not lie to us, though.

The child has to be born in Bethlehem, so the entire Roman domain has to comply with a writer's homemade census that sends its mother there to give birth? Nobody is resurrected after dying, but have you read all the "eyewitness evidence?" Talk about lying and contradictions. But the stakes were high: getting people to accept such nonsense meant power and careers for the writers. (One Christian founder, Tertullian, proclaimed, "It is impossible for a man to return from being dead; therefore, it must be true.") Big stakes often require bigger lies and stories. Keep this in mind the next time someone tells you to believe something without question. Red light alert. Don't take my word for it.

Forget “God” – I prefer Humanity

By AnonAgno94 ~

I scribbled this down a few weeks ago:

I had a moment today at work when I had a breakdown. The situation itself is not worth explaining, but the outcome of it is.

At times, departing from religion leaves me lonely and cynical of the world. What is the point of life? Of people? Why should I care?

A Yellow-winged grasshopper (Gastrimargus musicus) caught in a barbed-wire fence. The yellow back wings are usually only visible when in flight. This image was captured in the few seconds during which the unfortunate grasshopper's head was stuck in a barbed wire fence. Australia is currently experiencing a locust plague. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

But today as I was crying, my coworker hugged me. At one moment, they held my face in both of their hands, and they said how nice of a person I was, and I felt such empathy that it struck me very deeply. They said very kind words today that I just can’t get past them.

When I was a Christian, I often imagined Jesus as my comforter, my friend, my rock. But today I got a glimpse of how humanity has the ability to comfort, to sacrifice, to be love unconditionally, to forgive. We don’t need some supernatural figure to model those behaviors.

I lost eternity when I lost “god.” But reality is that I never had eternity, only thought I did. I also thought I lost “god,” but today I realized that I still have, and love, humanity, and that maybe I am still a good person without “god” after all, that I as a “little human” am capable of being something good without some “god” telling me to do so.

The “us” vs “them” mentality is a poison to the human race. Belittling our human capabilities to some imaginary being limits both us as individuals and as a species. The repulsive boundaries that dogmatic religion creates in an individual’s mind does not free them – it turns them into a blind dog with a shock collar on and limits them to have a less-than-realistic human experience. It’s repulsive. Some say, “Well, faith is a person’s choice –“ I might just disagree with that -- it’s a mental prison to escape facing realities of living, such as death. It’s a barbed wire fence keeping in sexual pleasure, unashamed love, and the freedom to create your own life purpose. Not to mention the ability to be a good person without “god.” Who would willingly choose that? But yet so many do, just as I did for my entire life up until this year.

I’m almost angry at a belief system that takes human progress and credits it to itself, and ultimately caps that progress in past ways.

Religion is like a pair of shoes on a child – at first, they are new, give foundation to the child’s steps, helps them explore the world. But after a while, they outgrow the shoes and get new ones – better ones, bigger ones. Our species is that child; we outgrow them and move on. I feel one day the same will be said of religion, of delusion. The “child” species we were is slowly growing into an adult, and those shoes are starting to become too tight and worn out for many such as myself. You outgrow and move on. But many choose to keep religion and limit themselves… keeping their old ways.

The day people begin to realize the true beauty of life without the shadow cast upon it by religion will be a huge victory for the human species.

Cultural Relativism or Basic Human Rights?

By Karen Garst ~

If you have never heard the term “cultural relativism” before, rest assured you are not alone. One really has to work hard to keep up with the new words and phrases that have popped up in the last few years, particularly on social media. Cultural relativism can be defined by this type of statement: “Women’s wearing of veils in certain Arab countries is just part of their culture and, therefore, we should not criticize them.” It is also reflected in the comment made by Secretary of State John Kerry when asked about whether our ally, Saudi Arabia, should allow women to drive. He responded that this decision was “best left to Saudi Arabia,” thus refusing to take a stand for the rights of women.

But Secretary Kerry and cultural relativists are making a serious mistake for one simple reason. Women don’t have a choice in these countries to decide for themselves whether they wear veils or whether can drive. It is this issue of choice that underlies all basic human rights and should not be construed as simply a “difference in cultural norms.” Mona Eltahawy, in her recent work entitled Headscarves and Hymens – Why the Middle East Needs a Sexual Revolution, states that “Cultural relativism is as much my enemy as the oppression I fight within my culture and faith.”[1]

The Human Rights Council is an inter-governmental body within the United Nations system “responsible for the promotion and protection of all human rights around the globe.” It is made up of 47 nations. The Universal Declaration of Human Rights, as promulgated by the HRC, contains important phrases such as  “recognition of the inherent dignity and of the equal and inalienable rights of all members of the human family,” “ the dignity and worth of the human person and in the equal rights of men and women,” and “a common standard of achievement for all peoples and all nations.” It also decrees that maintaining these basic human rights “is the foundation of freedom, justice and peace in the world.”

Let’s examine some of the practices that affect women throughout the globe and try to determine whether they would be upheld by the Human Rights Council as a violation of women’s human rights or whether they consist of different cultural norms that should not be criticized by those outside that culture.

Unchained at last

We must realize that it is not only in countries outside the United States that women’s human rights are blatantly violated. The Public Broadcasting System recently aired a program entitled “Unchained at Last” about the practice of older men marrying young girls in the United States.Unchained at Last is a non-profit corporation founded by an ex-Orthodox Jewish woman named Fraidy Reiss. According to its mission, it “helps any woman or girl in the US, from any community, culture or religion, who is or has been pressured, bribed, tricked, threatened, beaten or otherwise forced into marriage.” It is quite obvious that each of the verbs used in that sentence violate a woman’s basic human rights. The founder, whose husband turned out to be abusive after only one week, was trapped for twelve years in her marriage. When she finally escaped with her two daughters, her Orthodox Jewish family shunned her. Esther, whose story is told here in more detail, was married off at just 17. Because she was under 18, her parents signed her marriage certificate. Her husband wanted to see her have sex with other men and she was gang raped numerous times while he hid in the closet and watched. Esther explains why her parents forced her to marry this man. “They didn’t have a chance to grow and mature, so how could they raise children to grow and mature?” It is in this way that culture perpetuates itself. But to not criticize this aspect of culture is to condone it much as Secretary Kerry did in his comment about the Saudi Arabian practice of refusing to allow women to drive.

FGM

Female genital mutilation is the removal of part or all of the clitoris and part or all of the labia of the female genitalia. The obvious point in this cruel practice is to remove the organ that is responsible for sexual arousal and satisfaction in the female. The belief is that if this procedure is done on a pre-pubescent girl, she will not seek out a sexual partner prior to marriage, thus fulfilling the cultural and religious dictate to be a virgin when she marries, thus upholding the honor of her family. The requirement of virginity dates from at least the second millennium BCE as evidenced in the Old Testament. Once private property came into existence, the male head of household wanted to be sure that this property would pass to HIS children, thus virginity was paramount in a bride and adultery during marriage was severely punished. Because the young girl has no say in the matter, it is a basic violation of at least Article 3 of the GDHR – “Everyone has the right to life, liberty and security of person.”

A recent report by UNICEF on FGM gives us some hope as it shows that there has been a sharp decline in numerous countries where it is currently practiced. “Prevalence has dropped by as much as almost half among adolescent girls in Benin, the Central African Republic, Iraq, Liberia and Nigeria.” Education is helping. More and more mothers are becoming aware that this practice can lead to death and at the very least is torture.

Honor Killing

In her book entitled Unworthy Creature, Aruna Papp outlines her upbringing in India. Her story contains a litany of practices that everyone should agree violate the human rights of women. First, her mother had several coat-hanger abortions because abortion was not legal in her country. Second, Aruna herself was raped by a family friend. He raped her anally so that her “virginity” would be preserved (and probably also to increase his deniability). When she finally married, the man who raped her attended her wedding.

The scene that is the most heart-wrenching in her narrative, however, occurred when she was a teenager. She witnessed the burning of Kiran, a young neighbor girl. Kiran was burned to death because her family believed in some way that she had dishonored the family. Needless to say, no police or fire department was called to intervene to save her life. Aruna also found a dead baby girl on a garbage heap.

Each of us must do what we can in the countries that we live in to call out all the practices that do not treat women in the ways mandated by the UN Human Rights Council. I am most heartened by a young girl in Boorama town in North-West Somalia. “I don’t want any part of my body to be cut. I don’t want to be circumcised,” says 10-year old Kheiriya Abidi. Quite naturally she is terrified of the physical pain, torture and possible death that might occur. She had the support of her family, but of course not of the cultural norms in her country.

If Kheiriya can stand up for her rights, what can we do to support her and girls and women throughout the globe? We know that religion and culture are inextricably linked. If you are an atheist, have you told your friends? Do you talk to your friends about things you read like this blog post? There are many organizations that support women’s rights across the globe. Can you help support them financially? Listed below are just a few of them.

The Association of Women’s Rights in Development
Global Fund for Women
Women for Women International
Women Thrive Alliance

For a longer list, please see this New York Times article.

Karen Garst
The Faithless Feminist

[1] Mona Eltahawy, Headscarves and Hymens – Why the Middle East Needs a Sexual Revolution (New York, NY: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2015), 28

A Letter to My Dead Abusive Father

By Rae Blackwood ~

Do you remember the last thing you said to me?

Do you remember our last conversation?

I do.

We were standing in the kitchen. It was dark out, but the lights were bright inside. You were complaining about our beloved Otis having one single flea. You wanted to kick him out of the house because of a single bug.

We argued about it.

The next morning you were dead.

You killed yourself.

I questioned myself, I blamed myself and others for years. What could I have done? Could I have made a difference? Could I have talked to you, treated you different?

But the answer is no.

Did you think this was going to be an I’m sorry letter? It’s not. As a matter of fact it’s the opposite. You always told me you were a bad father. You always manipulated me into feeling sorry for that confession, as if it was my fault some how. The thing is, you were right, you were a very bad father.

The first memory I have of you, I made up. When I was a teenager, you asked me what my first memory was of you. When I looked at you blankly, you started to look sad. So I made something up. I told you I remember one of those rare, precious snow days where we made snow ice cream together. That was not a lie. I do remember that day, and it was really fun. But it was not my first memory of you.

My first memory of you was when you found me playing hide and seek in the church parking lot. I was in one of my favorite sunday dresses, it had a lace ruffle around the collar, sleeves, and bottom hem. I had on lace fringed socks and my black mary janes. I
was running around. I was happy. I was laughing with my friends. I was crouching beside a car, giggling, just knowing I had outsmarted my friends. That was until I felt someone grab the neck of my dress and start yelling at me.

It wasn’t a stranger. It wasn’t the boogey man, it was you.

When we got home I was told to pick a switch from a tree. I don’t know why, but I remember knowing what that meant. So being the smart girl that I thought I was, I pointed to the smallest twig I could see on the bradford pear tree. You took out your pocket knife and cut that small little switch. You pulled up my dress, you pulled down my panties, and you whipped me. Instead of warning me that my choice of switch would injure me more, you decided it was another lesson to learn. My choice of playing hide and seek in a parking lot where I could be ran over by a car warranted my five year old flesh being ripped and cut open from my buttox to my knees by my choice of weapon. Afterwards you made me promise not to tell anyone. I could only wear jeans to school. If I told, you would go to jail and if you did, how would we afford to eat?

My choice to choose a happier memory as my first memory of you was self preservation.

As I grew, my fear of you did as well.

Every Saturday after our happy father daughter breakfast, we would do yard work, or I would help mom at the grocery store. After one such breakfasts, I wasn’t feeling well. You rubbed my head and told me to go lay down, and you would take care of the yard by yourself. So I did what any other 8 year old would do. I grabbed a blanket, poured myself some juice, and laid on the couch watching cartoons.

What was even worse? You did it in the name of your God. Only when you came in to check on me, you yanked the blanket off of me. You told me that if I was really sick I wouldn't have the energy to watch TV. You dragged me outside and made me pick up pine cones in the woods as punishment. I threw up a half a dozen times until you were convinced I was either too sick or had worked long enough that I should be allowed to go in. I did not watch TV. I went into my bedroom and cried myself to sleep.

When I was 10 I had a problem remembering to turn off the lights when I left a room. You made me write sentences. So many, for that reason and others I don’t really remember, that my fingers ached. When the hundreds, maybe even thousands of lines didn’t help me remember to turn off the lights, you did something else.

You took off your shirt. You took off your belt and gave it to me. You got on all fours. You told me you were a bad father and deserved to be punished. I had to whip you for being a bad father. I cried. I sobbed. I begged. You shouted at me, from the floor. Do it. I’m a bad father. If I can’t teach my daughter to obey me, I’m a bad father. I deserve to be punished. DO IT!

You always wanted me to call you Papa. You always wanted me to say sir. I didn’t learn how to do that either because you took away my innocence. You stole my childhood from me, and even as young as I was, I knew what you did. What was even worse? You did it in the name of your God.

You took me fishing and when I was afraid of the water you got mad. So mad that when I felt bad about it, I told you it was ok. I didn’t realize I was being manipulated. God was going to take care of us. You were so happy. The hurricane had been through the day before. You put me in the canoe, you got in after me. We almost died.

The first time I stood up to you was when I thought you were going to actually hit your wife, my mother.

The other times after that it was just with words until I was 17.

You wrapped your hands around my throat and choked me because I was on the phone when you wanted to be. As I was choking you told me that you owned everything and everyone in the house because you were a man. God made men the head of the house. I managed to grab a pencil and stab you. I got away.

But I came home. I had to. Don’t you remember? You were so upset you made mom call my boyfriends house? They went to church with us. Church people cover up for each other. You even told me that. You used to be a preacher. But you quit. You always told me stories about how you didn’t like the politics of church. How there was so much hypocrisy.

Really?

I could go on. I could remind you of what you did to my siblings. I could list all of the things that you did to the three of us. However those are their letters to write.

The sad thing is, everyone thought you were the perfect dad, the perfect husband. Even our own family. The signs were all there. But what could they say? You were a man of God. You prayed for forgiveness for your sins. So those sins were forgiven. Even if
you did the same thing again the next day.

I want to make something very clear. You are not forgiven. You were a bad father. You were a bad human being. There is no such thing as hell, but if there was you would be there. Instead you were a waste of life. I am grateful for one thing. Your sperm. It gave me life. Your lessons and your fear-mongering made me a strong woman.

Raising children on fear of a higher power, of eternal damnation if they don’t obey, is child abuse.

I felt guilty for a long time thinking all of these things because you killed yourself. But I don’t anymore. I remember you now as a bad memory. Someone I wish I could forget. But I can’t. Because you took my innocence.

-Your youngest daughter.

I Daydream, Therefore I am

By Carl S ~

The 1962 movie, "Gigot," (pronounced: zhih-GO) features the Catholic comedian Jackie Gleason as the title character. It's about a middle aged deaf-mute and the young girl he befriends in Paris. The young lady is the daughter of a well-known prostitute, and Gigot is the laughingstock of the city; so both of them are outcasts. Gigot spends time showing the girl the sights of the city. I still remember one emotionally powerful scene, even this many years after seeing the movie: In the center of an empty gothic cathedral at mid-day, the two of them look up and see the life sized crucifix hanging above the far-off altar. The girl asks, "Who is that man on a cross?" Gigot stares, and throws out his arms, searching for a way to explain what "that man" means to him. He cannot speak. In frustration, he pounds his fists on his mouth.

Gigot (film) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I mentioned this scene to my Christian wife, hoping to explain my frustration in trying to get through to believers. Unless you see it for yourself, though, it's only another person's experience. But it explains a lot, both from the believers' and unbelievers' positions. When faced with evidence which questions their beliefs, believers will double down and dig in defensively, as if their personalities are being assaulted. If the believer is a churchgoer, questioning faith will make that person more committed, emotionally, socially, and financially, to the church. The church community is, after all, a fragile fortress against doubts and truths. And that figure on the cross, touted as a representation of love, also represents repressed fear of questions.

We who've been raised to respect Christian beliefs as normal, have experienced those emotions. But we have gone on from there, confronting our doubts, and found them friendly and honest. We have battled against the irrational and demeaning beliefs. We have come to reject them as we've paid attention to the contradictions, dishonesty and hypocrisy Christianity has in its roots. We've come to realize that beliefs are not only unnecessary for virtue: often they destroy virtue. True, there is frequently a price to pay with believers: they will reject and/or make fun of us as being non-understanding or even immoral. At the heart of this is the reaction against those who will go where they are afraid to tread. (We should consider ourselves fortunate in one respect: religions, when in power, have always treated the pioneers, the bearers of reality, as messengers who are to be killed.)

To return to the movie, what could explain the reaction of Gigot? Why - he was surrounded by a man-made ambiance, a cathedral, deliberately made to overwhelm the senses, to focus on a solitary figure hanging in the sun's rays. Haven't all temples been created, for all the gods, in order to produce the same emotions? Isn't the idol of this god-man Jesus just as fictional as other worshipped gods, and as fictional as the character, Gigot? Can't you see believers in other gods just as frustrated as Gigot, in explaining their god’s natures and desires? Didn't they also live in powerful emotional commitment? By our own experiences with believers today, can't we imagine the ancients’ frustration, their rejecting evidence for the non-existence of their gods? They who cannot explain what they claim to understand, do not themselves understand what they are saying.

That man, beating his fists against his mouth has, unaware, swallowed a god of another's choosing, hook, line, and sinker. He has accepted another's daydream/religious fantasy in place of his own. Humans daydream, therefore we are. This is how we interpret the world, and how we continually change the world around us. We dream of, and daydream, solutions to problems. We dream of worlds to achieve, daydream of relationships with persons who are non-existent, even of relationships with actual humans who would not give us the time of day. We just do. No other animal does this, otherwise we would have proof, in bridges, ships, electricity ,etc., not to mention idols, temples, and religious wars. This is why we humans make progress and mistakes; humans lying awake at night or in the midst of a lazy day, or reacting to tragedy, allowing idealizations and fantasies to flow in, invited or not. Daydreams lead to ideas, to conceptions much like natural conceptions born in mini-ecstasies, often followed by miscarriages, spontaneous abortions. With enough perseverance and patience, there are new births, which have to be further developed and nurtured to maturity. We create, therefore we are. Our daydreams become our natural children. And our personal daydreams can be infectious, adopted by others and expanded on. Let the other person be free to daydream of a personal god or gods, or loving savior; that is his or her own right. All is well as long as one person's daydream doesn't become another person's nightmare.

We daydream, but we can and do realize our daydreams through the tools we have: Nature, as observed, recorded, and played back through amplification, magnification and slow motion, stop-motion and rapid photography, as seen with our extended senses of telescopes, space probes, micro and sub-atomic sensors. We can and do re-create our daydreams in audio and video, without confusing them with reality. Religions do not. Nature, unlike humans, does not lie to us, but people do.
In spite of this magnitude of evidence, there are still many humans who will reject it, preferring their other-implanted daydream fantasy world. Trying to get through this impenetrable barrier is most frustrating. I have no answer for changing this attitude except to recommend you show them by example and just living that you don't need their god or obsessive beliefs in order to be happy and content, contrary to what they have been told. Perhaps some day, they will daydream what their own lives can be without irrational fear. It's human. It's a start.

What hope we have as an ANCHOR of the soul

By Lethargic Sweetheart ~

I have recently started questioning the Christian faith I've been raised to believe in. It happened when I was reading my Bible and stumbled upon several passages I don't agree with (those passages being the ones that condone rape and state that you must marry your rapist), and I realized.

The vast majority of the things in that book are the complete opposite of what I believe in. Having been raped, I can not in any way, shape, or form understand how a loving god could make you marry the person who did it. In fact, I couldn't remember the last time the Bible gave me comfort; instead, it filled me with anxiety, depressing thoughts, and feelings of worthlessness.

And thus, a tiny revolution sparked inside my mind. And I let go.

If you're anything like me, you probably know where I'm coming from when I say that I still have doubts. At the moment, I refer to myself as agnostic. But the longer I stray from my religion, the more... free I feel. I feel like there's hope. I don't feel like some almighty being is gonna send me to hell every time I have sex or cuss or etc.

I have my days where I get scared, like I'm wrong and I'm actually going to hell and etc.. But most of the time, I feel more free, more alive, more open minded.

It's amazing.