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Family Life in Heaven

By Alex ~

I am writing this piece regarding the worthlessness of life described by many, but not all Christians concerning marriage and family life in Heaven. First off, I am writing this from a point of view for the possibility of an afterlife.

First off, I’d like to tackle one aspect which I haven’t seen mentioned on here:

MT 22:23 That same day the Sadducees, who say there is no resurrection, came to him with a question. 24 "Teacher," they said, "Moses told us that if a man dies without having children, his brother must marry the widow and have children for him. 25 Now there were seven brothers among us. The first one married and died, and since he had no children, he left his wife to his brother. 26 The same thing happened to the second and third brother, right on down to the seventh. 27 Finally, the woman died. 28 Now then, at the resurrection, whose wife will she be of the seven, since all of them were married to her?"

In the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels of God in heaven” (Matt 22:30)

This part is often used to denounce marriage in Heaven in favour of a spiritual marriage with Christ. I find this a complete and utter abomination of what every man and woman on Earth hopes to find, a long lasting unification with a spouse. It is revolting that I read stuff such as ‘ I couldn’t bare to be with someone forever.’ Are you actually in love? You don’t wake up in the morning thinking ‘How long do I have to spend with this person?’

Furthermore, many Christians bang discuss the repulsive separation of God-given unity called divorce. Yet wouldn’t God be doing this on the grandest of scales? Separating everyone and putting Jesus Christ in their place instead? Fine, I get it that marriage according to Christians is supposed to represent the relationship between Jesus and the Church on a Heavenly scale, but to then denounce personal relationships which mean so much is an evil act of spiritual barbarianism.

Marriage, parenthood, sex, are all deemed as gifts from God, yet it is the ability to rip it all away at death which makes temporal marriage repulsive and detrimental for relationships which we as human beings actively pursue and seek to maintain.Why get married? How can you look at your husband or wife every morning, believing that once they die, they will have their every need attended to by Jesus which doesn’t include you? It’s OK I suppose, we’ll just be friends. We’ll still feel love for each other, but the love for Jesus will be greater (Shakes head).

There is the issue of people who have married more than once, as stated in the Bible. Surely there must be a process in which to ensure everyone has a companion and embraces the full merits of marriage? After all, Noah’s Ark illustrates a pairing of animals which is often ignored.

I am aware that Mormons believe in eternal marriage, but there are conditions attached such as marrying in a temple by someone with a priesthood. Why such conditions?

When I looked over the account of Adam and Even in Genesis (NIV), I noticed that God was walking in Eden and made Adam. He saw Adam was lonely and created a female. What does that say? That despite Adam having been in the presence of God, he was still given a companion.

Surely God would do the same, everyone happy with their marriage would be fine. Anyone not happy, or single, or with multiple partners would be arranged accordingly so that we’d all have a companion. It may not be marriage in the way things are done on Earth, but God would unionise two into one. Instead, Christians call it New Age thinking.

Next up is the complete self-centeredness regarding the prospect of being saved. So much is said about the fact that God will remove memories of unbelievers from your mind at the Judgement, that God will fulfill you so much, others won’t come into your mind. I’m sorry, but that sounds robotic. I shall refer to an example here. Lets say you’re in the New Earth and you’re making a cake which your mother taught you. You’re hosting a party with your friends. Your mother was a Hindu who is currently burning in the lake of fire. You try to remember who taught you how to make the cake. All you get is the image of God. A friend walks in with their mother who is helping you organize the party. You look at her for a while, then carry on with the cake. Do you get my drift? Does this sound right to you?

Some claim that you do remember those unbelievers, but as mentioned, you’re so engrossed by God, that anything else pales into insignificance. And that includes your parents, marriage, kids. What about liberty? A freedom to feel love for those you value the most, the ability to love independently and really value those treasures in your life, those which make you pure and contribute to the way you function as a being. I don’t understand the desire to disregard all of that.

The talk of ‘God is holy and just’ makes me cringe every time they refer to Hell as an eternal fire and brimstone place of torture. They talk about deception, yet if they took off their rose-tinted glasses, 99.9% of people would call it the doctrine of demons. The hypocrisy in fundamentalist corners in particular advocating the death penalty, torture methods (shocking stuff from the Republicans recently), yet they see themselves as the ‘elect’, full of love, grace, mercy, compassion and understanding. They talk about God being the giver of life, yet again, they take it away at the first chance they get.

Christian Heaven ... you are separated from your spouse, lose memories with feelings modified to deal with loss of loved ones forever and an eternal life where the feeling of Jesus empowers all other feelings. In fact, whilst I’m at it, why bother having a family? What is the point if most will be burned in hell or God and Jesus will take over the reins? Apparently, believers will be our new family. Any selfishness and self-focused thoughts will be removed. Can anyone else see the irony in the last two sentences?

If our Earthly relationships are eroded or substituted in this Heaven, then who’d seriously want a part in it? It is no good seeing these relationships being reduced into mere friendships, where marriages are abolished in favour of the ultimate cosmic marriage, where parenthood, best friends are replaced by equal friendships. Every close relationship we have holds a jewel of love only we as individuals can recognize. Our love for our mother and father is different to that for our husband, wife, partner, best friend, but each are so unique. Each are a unique piece of treasure which does not deserve the claim by Christians to be wiped out in favour of equal portions of love to everyone or to be focused on Jesus only. This is not selfish. This is ultimate love for those who have been there for us in trials and tribulations. I do not want my special love for my parents to be embedded for neighbours or strangers. They hold a different kind of love which still involves compassion, understanding, friendship, loyalty and sacrifice. There is something about parental love, love for a spouse, a child which does not come into the same category as love for a stranger. It is love, but of a different, deeper kind. This should not be removed. If anything, it should be enhanced.

My biggest insecurity is being alone and losing those I love the most. The Christian Heaven does this and worse, it acts as a substitution. You can have Jesus Christ instead. What about both? Why am I continually told that relationships are redefined in Heaven? Sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Dr Paul Enns wrote a book called ‘Heaven Revealed’, which was a Biblical analysis on what Heaven is like. This is a segment of a review from;

At first I was seriously concerned that the main point of his book was just that we will be reunited with believing loved ones in heaven. His grief over the loss of Helen is repeated over and over in the initial chapters. It almost seemed that he was more happy to see Helen that to see Jesus! But as I continued reading, I saw more focus on God's glory and less on his own personal loss.
Then, at the end of this person’s review:
I admit that I have not suffered the death of someone very close to me, so the prospect of heavenly reunions doesn't speak to my heart as much as it does to the author and to many readers who have. I do look forward to seeing God face to face and consider this the highest reward of heaven.

I think the review speaks volumes. I have written a piece on here called ‘Crown me with many crowns’. Rewards should be family, peace, joy, unity, helping others. When you meet strangers for the first time, you do so behaving in a dignified, respectable manner. However, we all need a stable base to go to. We have our parents, our wife/husband or friends. Where is this sanctuary in which all humans need to rest, energise and share their deepest feelings? The answer always seems to be God according to Christians. What about my family? What about my closest friends?

On a more aggressive note, why is everything in Heaven void of anything on Earth? God created the Earth according to Christians, yet they seem to hate everything on it. Will they admit that they do not like God’s Creation? No, they will not.

So ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Christian Heaven. One whereby you are separated from your spouse, lose memories with feelings modified to deal with loss of loved ones forever and an eternal life where the feeling of Jesus empowers all other feelings. Is this really Heaven, a place which is ‘Anything But Earth’? Or a cult seeking to have their every desire met by one entity at the expense of others?