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Let It Go: A Fond Farewell

By Eban ~

Being a black male in the United States and living in Oklahoma I’ve become used to hearing about the wonderful joys of Jesus and God. Being part of a family raised in church, I’ve become used to going to church and hearing about the wonderful joys of god and Jesus. But over the years, I have also seen what God, Jesus and even Allah have also become to those trapped in a cycle of drugs, violence and even death. I always look over the last 4-5 decades and wonder, what happened? To what you may ask? What happened to the sense of pride, the sense of duty to family, work, health, and self? What happened to idea of looking at yourself and asking what have I become? What is the purpose of what I am doing? Is what I’m doing benefiting me and or my family in the long run? What must I do to improve myself, or get out of the squalor that I am in?

A state squalor doesn't have to necessarily mean living in a housing project or neighborhood overrun with poverty, crime, and being caught in the environment, it can mean being in a poor state of mind, being married and having marriage problems, being without a job, having a job you hate, any type of problem or array of problems you or your loved ones may be faced with now or even in the future. Your squalor could also be your past.

In the last 2 decades of my life, I’ve become used to hearing how people prayed to God, Jesus or Allah and were apparently delivered and saved from their life of decadence and destruction. Let me make it clear, that I don’t have anything against finding religion to help you change your life in any way just as long as you actually change your ways. If you were a drug dealer, pimp, prostitute, abusive parent, alcoholic, adulterer, or just a complete scumbag your whole life and legitimately want to change your life and your ways and you feel that religion will help you, I have no problem with that. However, if you are one of those types who apparently needs to keep praying or needs other people to pray for you to change, then this article is definitely something you need to read. Will it offend you? Piss you off? Yes it will, and I hope it does. If you’ve been a scumbag all your life, why the hell should I sugar coat anything I write? If you’re the type who engages unsavory and hypocritical behavior and seems to think you get away with that by saying “oops my bad Jesus” this article isn’t going to let you just wipe your ass call hail Mary to say the least.

The inexcusable behavior that people have been engaging in over the decades is pretty much embarrassing and almost makes me ashamed to be a human being in general. I’m going to make this short and sweet. At some point, God and Allah became an excuse to not progress in this world, to be lazy, to engage in any type of inhumane behavior and act as irresponsible as you please. Don’t worry, the devil is making you do all those things right? Even a child knows that is just another terrible excuse to justify reprehensible behavior. To me all three of these deities have been used to stifle progress within not just black communities but anywhere that they are brought. These three deities have been used to justify annihilation of not only cultures, but also knowledge and even history itself through nonsense such as revisionism, which is basically just a way of urinating on the grave of a civilization that has been annihilated and wiped off the face of the earth. To me, as a black male, God, Satan, and Allah have been used to keep black men and women divided to a point where our families are torn between doing what’s right for themselves and their families and what’s apparently right in the eyes of god.

Black men and women have been for over a century praying to god and Allah every day and it seems either both of them are deaf, blind, or, to be quite frank, just don’t give a fuck. The only thing that praying to these two deities has done is give us decades of nothing but pain and suffering that continues to this day. Pandemic rates of murder, mass incarceration, drop –out rates, disease, gangs, drugs, and an entitled mindset that continues to permeate throughout the community.

It has been 5 decades since the march on Washington and Martin Luther King’s "I have a dream" speech and blacks in the U.S don’t have much to show for it. Now some of you may be saying “but we have Barack Obama as president”. Yes, that is true, but unfortunately, that doesn’t make up for the decades of decadence and destruction that has plagued the black community for decades. If King could see the amount of churches within these war zones called neighborhoods and projects, the amount of bloodshed, and the lack of action on the part of these preachers and leaders within the community, I could probably bet any amount he would hang his head in both shame and disgust. He would be horrified to know that we protect murders in our neighborhoods for fear of being called a snitch, to know that black folks are proud to be dumb and uneducated after he and other leaders and people spent decades trying to desegregate the very schools that black men and women are simply dropping out of to sell crack, to gang-bang and to go jail. He would be horrified to know that there are hundreds of churches within black neighborhoods with money-hungry, scandalous pastors who seem to only be interested in how much money is your pocket rather than actually practicing what the bible teaches.

I know I got a bit off track, but I think it is best I give insight into what goes on within black communities across the U.S. It has been long past the time to quit using the devil as an excuse for your abhorrent behavior, quit looking for a leader, a savior, and a hand out. It’s time to let go. Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting all of your fond memories of the church however, I can say the church has left its legacy for some good, I have said before, and that it protected many black families and even gave them what they could not have at a time when there was little opportunity and I can respect that. The black church gave us great memories of the jerry curl laden pastor and ushers, those wonderful hats that those elderly women have on, the clip ties on those little boys, the pretty dresses on those little girls we all knew were ugly as could be, the choir, the bible school for children, the naps that some of us took during those boring sermons that the pastor gave, the dry cracker and the grape juice who played the role of the flesh and blood of Christ and never got any thanks. And who could forget, the Holy Spirit. He seems to have always had a way with elderly women in the churches I’ve been in.

I never got to know communion but I’m pretty sure the Catholics have fond memories of him and also all the fun you had laughing at the movies that made fun of the pope and the Catholic church in general. Let’s not forget our former Mormons, who have given us great things such as the movies Latter Days and Orgazmo, and a good reason not to marry multiple women. I really can’t forget the Nation of Islam, where would black folks be without all those bean pies and Final Calls and those warnings about not eating the pork and staying away from the Jewish and white women?! I also can't forget the Jehovah's Witness, where would we be without you guys? Probably still sleep, but the movie Friday wouldn't be the same without you! How could I forget the Mega Pastors? Come here you scandalous rascals! You guys are part of the reason Ex-Christians and this website exist! Where would the church be without your greedy asses! I do sincerely apologize if I have forgotten any religious organizations, groups, ideologies, but again, we probably wouldn't exist if you weren't causing so much chaos and craziness in our lives! I must let go of religion, as do we all if we are to move forward in this world and live productive lives.