A Pilgrim in Progress

By dharma ~

Not long ago I decided to share a few of the inspiring testimonies from this site. I posted them on my Facebook page. Now anyone who really knows me knows that I would not join an on line community for popularity purposes. I am not inclined to kiss any of the gluteus muscles of the fad-following, misinformed majority. Nope, I join a community to find like-minded people. Yet, my non-believer comments to a couple of fellow de-converting xians instantly drew a bit of righteous criticism.

Now, I am sure you have guessed that this criticism came from xians. These xians who chose to befriend me do not like my opinions. Shocking, isn’t it? So I was forced to delete a slew of xian propaganda posts from my wall. Then I responded rationally to my sister-in-law's naive and condescending remarks. And this was not easy, given that she chose to use my deceased Dad, whom I loved dearly, as a weapon against me. She told me that I may not care to see my father again, but it was not fair of me to suggest that my brother would never have the chance. And how could I not want to be reunited with my Dad? Did I ever have any love for him? How dare I do such a thing! Now, through your computer screen, can you feel the ultra intense heat of me seething at such an ignorant statement and such incredibly stupid questions?

Well, over the next few days I went from fifty ‘friends’ to forty friends. It was then that my younger sister called me and asked me why I could not just behave myself. I said simply that if I had to put up with their incessant religious babbling, then it was not going to kill them see a non-xian post or two here and there. After that a couple of peaceful weeks passed. Then something miraculous happened. My younger sister called me again. But this time she had a question. And it was a question related to religion. I nearly hyperventilated. I could barely contain myself. Briefly, I wondered if she had read any of the testimonies that had appeared on my wall. I know from personal experience that when you are exposed to logic you cannot help but begin to ask questions. And when you actually try to sort out the truth from the stories and the personal opinions of others you become a pilgrim ‘in progress’. Even though her question was not about the teachings of xianity I still see this as phenomenal, because she and I do not discuss religion. We do not discuss religion. And she called me with a question!

Now to avoid repeating ‘she’, ‘her’ and ‘my sister’ over and over again I will refer to my sister as Kayli. Kayli's question was simple: She asked me if the Xmas tree was relevant to xianity. You see, she wants to buy a black tree and decorate it with fuchsia and lime bulbs. I think it would be an awesome tree, but then I would. Well, Kayli’s co-workers pitched a fit and told her that it would be sacrilegious. They were positive that this would make the little baby heyseuss cry. Now I am not wise in the ways of texting terminology, but I believe the proper code here is LMFAO. I believe that is correct. It is not polite, but correct.

Anyway, I explained that to the best of my knowledge the Xmas tree was born of Pagan tradition. It was originally a symbol of the victory of life (things that remained green) over death (winter time), making it the first real tree of life, I suppose. I encouraged Kayli to look this information up on her own. And possibly print a copy for her co-workers, because after all, knowledge is power. I was so pleased to know that she was pleased to know that the ‘Xmas’ tree was not divinely inspired. Kayli was actually happy that xian’s had merely adopted the tradition of bringing a tree into the house and decorating it. I did not add that they had done the same thing with every other aspect of xtianity right on down to their god figure, a shadow clone of Zoroaster. It was here that I fought down the glorious overwhelming urge to share more knowledge of the disbeliever with her. But the last thing I wanted was for Kayli to be overwhelmed and retreat. I know how blissful it can be to see just what we want to see. And it is no fun when the truth dons a tuxedo of arrogance, waltzes by and smacks us upside the head. It is so much better when reality leisurely taps us on the shoulder, introduces itself and asks us to dance. Baby steps, I thought to myself, baby steps.

Now I am so proud to share the news that my little sister has become a seeker of truth and my heart is bursting with joy. It is just a matter of time now and I am looking forward to supporting her as Kayli breaks her indoctrinated beliefs down into the pieces and the parts that, for now, hide reality. My sister will get to the truth. Because the truth is what it is, and we are what we are, and that is what makes us special. Not sinners, not worthless, not blessed, not chosen, not immortal… just plain ol’ special. This reminded me of a poem I wrote last year. Please forgive me, but I would like to share it in honor of my little sister’s question. So, in honor of her and of the true love my baby sister and I have for xmas trees and ornaments, I submit to you a Xmas poem.

'Do You See What I See?'

I first saw myself in the mirrors across the street.

It seemed I was the most beautiful Christmas tree.

Decorations of icicles, tinsel, lights and bows,

my lovely reflection in the store window glowed.

Until one morning, when I was placed in a box

and I discovered, a Christmas tree I was not.

Packaged with care, onto a shelf I went

for I was but a tiny snowflake covered ornament.

Thank you for reading my pre-holiday 'pilgrim in progress' rant. Now, good night to all and to all a good night.