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Losing Faith

By Jodi ~

I was born and raised in a conservative christian family. I went to a christian school, was not allowed to listen to rock and roll, and was taught that the rest of the world is doomed to hell and only the "good christians" were going to make it to heaven. And as a young child I believed it. For me losing my faith has been a very long slow process. There was never that "aha" moment that so many others have. I had so many spiritual questions that no one could answer, and I would hear "just have faith", but I couldn't. Questions of science, cruelty and suffering in the world, human sexuality, contradictions in the bible, history of the bible, differing believes in the many christian churches (what made mine right?), and the list goes on.

As the years passed I slowly started to see there is no proof of christianity and/or any other religion. I began to realize that the "evil" world maybe is not so evil, and the "good" christian world maybe isn't so good.

A part of me still considers myself "christian" simply because that is all I have ever known. But if I am honest with myself I have to acknowledge I am Agnostic-and be at peace with that.