Skip to main content

From Theist to Atheist - adventure of a lifetime

By Griffin9857 ~

When I was a kid I belonged to a relatively conservative but non-religious family. We may have been to church twice in my childhood – both times for specific people/events.

Needless to say my religious upbringing never really happened, until later.

When I was fifteen my family moved to Fiji as my father had a job lined up there, we were to be there for three years while I went to school along with my siblings. We packed up our stuff into little boxes ready for the tropics and off we went.

Nothing overly religious occurred there apart from the occasional conversation or argument that crops up in an international school where most of the students are from one religious group or another. Really, all of us were more interested in who was dating who or what was likely to happen in the weekends.

Our time in Fiji was cut short, it was a year and a half later when we moved back to Auckland, the city I grew up in. Prior to Fiji we were living in the capital, Wellington. I had lost most of my childhood friends by this point as they had all moved away or were barely recognisable as who they were. I hadn’t seen most of them since I was 10.

I was 17 by this point, looking for new friends and for the picking by theists.

And that’s how it happened really, I was in school in the library during a history lesson when two people, siblings, started to sprout nonsense about god, creation mythology and god’s supremacy over all other gods/faiths. I had always had a problem with smug idiots who think they know everything and I wanted to nail them for it so I said something snide. Their response was to discuss in excruciating detail what hell is like (verses included) to REALLY scare me silly. with images of fire, the one thing that scares the shit outta me. Needless to say it got me thinking, and with continuous long term persuasion, friendships forming and progressing, I caved and became a theist.

I started off at their church, a Pentecostal screamer church with being slain in the spirit (being touched and falling over to the uninitiated), speaking and interpreting in tongues, anointing with oil, you name it, it happened. It never sat well with me when I physically COULDN’T react the same way they were (getting drunk on the spirit, tongues etc), instead of realising it for what it was – me being duped, I ended up at a different church courtesy of a friend.

For the next few years nothing seemed to be a problem, I was respected and liked by the children in the Sunday school, I made lots of friends and seemed to fit in nicely. The only problem was when I decided to read the bible for myself – cover to cover. I got as far as exodus when the punishments for misdemeanours became apparent to me and I started to question god’s character. By the time I had read through kings I had not only questioned his character, but his sanity and temperament as well. The god of the bible had turned from a cuddly glowing teddybear into a dangerous bloodthirsty sociopath bent on killing everyone who even looked at him funny. I was starting to also wane in my convictions in terms of converting people as well. I had all but given up on the people I was living with, and had effectively stopped believing that I was being heard – especially when I was in a tangle after the whole hell debarcle. I started reading what “the other side” were saying, and for once it started to make sense. I was listening to them, and I can tell you that I had never felt so scared in my life, waiting for the lightening bolt to just cut me in half.

When it never came and I found myself not having a theist leg to stand on I realised I had to face facts, god will never answer my prayers because he is fiction.

I went through the usual (I think) state of anger and resentment, becoming a loud rabid screaming atheist and drove everyone nuts about it. I have largely calmed down since then, but the dogma hasn’t shut off completely yet and I still catch myself “thinking theist” and that takes effort to shut off.

My only real goal is to be able to undo the damage in my own head first, and to help others reach the same goal, I have never been so excited about life now, and can’t wait to see how it transpires.

Wish me luck.


Popular posts from this blog

Are You an Atheist Success Story?

By Avangelism Project ~ F acts don’t spread. Stories do. It’s how (good) marketing works, it’s how elections (unfortunately) are won and lost, and it’s how (all) religion spreads. Proselytization isn’t accomplished with better arguments. It’s accomplished with better stories and it’s time we atheists catch up. It’s not like atheists don’t love a good story. Head over to the atheist reddit and take a look if you don’t believe me. We’re all over stories painting religion in a bad light. Nothing wrong with that, but we ignore the value of a story or a testimonial when we’re dealing with Christians. We can’t be so proud to argue the semantics of whether atheism is a belief or deconversion is actually proselytization. When we become more interested in defining our terms than in affecting people, we’ve relegated ourselves to irrelevance preferring to be smug in our minority, but semantically correct, nonbelief. Results Determine Reality The thing is when we opt to bury our

So Just How Dumb Were Jesus’ Disciples? The Resurrection, Part VII.

By Robert Conner ~ T he first mention of Jesus’ resurrection comes from a letter written by Paul of Tarsus. Paul appears to have had no interest whatsoever in the “historical” Jesus: “even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, we know him so no longer.” ( 2 Corinthians 5:16 ) Paul’s surviving letters never once mention any of Jesus’ many exorcisms and healings, the raising of Lazarus, or Jesus’ virgin birth, and barely allude to Jesus’ teaching. For Paul, Jesus only gets interesting after he’s dead, but even here Paul’s attention to detail is sketchy at best. For instance, Paul says Jesus “was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures” ( 1 Corinthians 15:4 ), but there are no scriptures that foretell the Jewish Messiah would at long last appear only to die at the hands of Gentiles, much less that the Messiah would then be raised from the dead after three days. After his miraculous conversion on the road to Damascus—an event Paul never mentions in his lette

Christian TV presenter reads out Star Wars plot as story of salvation

An email prankster tricked the host of a Christian TV show into reading out the plots of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Star Wars in the belief they were stories of personal salvation. The unsuspecting host read out most of the opening rap to The Fresh Prince, a 1990s US sitcom starring Will Smith , apparently unaware that it was not a genuine testimony of faith. The prankster had slightly adapted the lyrics but the references to a misspent youth playing basketball in West Philadelphia would have been instantly familiar to most viewers. The lines read out by the DJ included: "One day a couple of guys who were up to no good starting making trouble in my living area. I ended up getting into a fight, which terrified my mother." The presenter on Genesis TV , a British Christian channel, eventually realised that he was being pranked and cut the story short – only to move on to another spoof email based on the plot of the Star Wars films. It began: &quo


By David Andrew Dugle ~   S ettle down now children, here's the story from the Book of David called The Parable of the Bent Cross. In the land Southeast of Eden –  Eden, Minnesota that is – between two rivers called the Big Miami and the Little Miami, in the name of Saint Gertrude there was once built a church. Here next to it was also built a fine parochial school. The congregation thrived and after a multitude of years, a new, bigger church was erected, well made with clean straight lines and a high steeple topped with a tall, thin cross of gold. The faithful felt proud, but now very low was their money. Their Sunday offerings and school fees did not suffice. Anon, they decided to raise money in an unclean way. One fine summer day the faithful erected tents in the chariot lot between the two buildings. In the tents they set up all manner of games – ring toss, bingo, little mechanical racing horses and roulette wheels – then all who lived in the land between the two rivers we

Morality is not a Good Argument for Christianity

By austinrohm ~ I wrote this article as I was deconverting in my own head: I never talked with anyone about it, but it was a letter I wrote as if I was writing to all the Christians in my life who constantly brought up how morality was the best argument for Christianity. No Christian has read this so far, but it is written from the point of view of a frustrated closeted atheist whose only outlet was organizing his thoughts on the keyboard. A common phrase used with non-Christians is: “Well without God, there isn’t a foundation of morality. If God is not real, then you could go around killing and raping.” There are a few things which must be addressed. 1. Show me objective morality. Define it and show me an example. Different Christians have different moral standards depending on how they interpret the Bible. Often times, they will just find what they believe, then go back into scripture and find a way to validate it. Conversely, many feel a particular action is not

On Living Virtuously

By Webmdave ~  A s a Christian, living virtuously meant living in a manner that pleased God. Pleasing god (or living virtuously) was explained as: Praying for forgiveness for sins  Accepting Christ as Savior  Frequently reading the Bible  Memorizing Bible verses Being baptized (subject to church rules)  Attending church services  Partaking of the Lord’s Supper  Tithing  Resisting temptations to lie, steal, smoke, drink, party, have lustful thoughts, have sex (outside of marriage) masturbate, etc.  Boldly sharing the Gospel of Salvation with unbelievers The list of virtuous values and expectations grew over time. Once the initial foundational values were safely under the belt, “more virtues'' were introduced. Newer introductions included (among others) harsh condemnation of “worldly” music, homosexuality and abortion Eventually the list of values grew ponderous, and these ideals were not just personal for us Christians. These virtues were used to condemn and disrespect fro