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A Secular Guide to Cliché Christian Statements

By xxkindofboredxx ~

Since my deconversion in early 2013, I've realized that to get most Christians to think about their beliefs, you have to dismantle it from the inside. After all, that's what happened to me! You can try to use evolution and facts the Bible got wrong about how the world actually works, but most devoted conservative Christians will ignore that evidence. This is because they see evolution and the "free-thinkers movement" as a conspiracy, and the faulty science in the Bible as a "product of [ancient Jewish] culture." So I decided to make this little list of common Christian defenses for God and the Bible. Obviously this list is by no means comprehensive, but these are the ones I feel are the most commonly used by the religious community. So here is my

- secular guide to -

Cliché Christian Statements


Without God, there is no objective morality.


Do you support slavery? Because the Bible sure does.

Even if there is an “objective morality,” how do you know it is from your God? Or from a God at all? Could it be something that is inherent in the universe, then?

Why is a universal objective morality even necessary? Most people agree that it is good to treat others with respect, and bad to harm others. Why all the arbitrary rules of the Bible that don’t serve but to make life more difficult for those who follow them?


The punishment for sin is death. So even though God doesn’t want to, he has to send people who die without Christ to hell.


If God created reality, and all the natural laws and rules that make up reality, then who made up the rule that death is the punishment for sin?

If God is all-powerful and answers to no-one, then he doesn’t have to do anything. The only reason he would ever do anything is because he wanted to.


God doesn’t want anyone to go to hell, and hell was created for the devil and the demons.


If God doesn’t want anyone to go to hell, then why does he create people he knows will go to hell?

If God is omnipotent, then he would have known ahead of time what hell would be used for (by his own command, no less). Consequently, it would logically follow that he intended to send sinners to hell the whole time.


God didn’t create sin; the Lucifer rebelled, and that’s where sin comes from.


If God literally created everything, then how can anything exist without him having made it? How could the concept of sin even exist without God?


Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice (so you owe him).


According to the Bible, God is infinite. So if he has existed for eternity past, and will exist for eternity in the future, then in comparison, how long was 9 hours on a cross? Mathematically speaking, compared to infinity, the time Jesus spent suffering was infinitely short.

Even if you believe that Jesus spent 3 days in hell, that’s still an infinitely small amount of time. Anything less than an infinite amount of time is infinitely small compared to eternity. (Would you like some infinity with that infinity?)

Also, if God cannot abide with sin, then how did Jesus go to hell for three days?

If Christianity is true, than the ultimate sacrifice is actually made by anyone who goes to hell. As the afterlife drags on, the duration of their earthly lives becomes smaller and smaller compared to their time spent in hell. In the scope of infinity, their time on earth was infinitely short. So how bad did Jesus have it, again?


God cannot sin.


Logically speaking, that would be correct, since “sin” is defined as anything that goes against God’s will.

Even if God could sin, then is God really sinning if “sin” is defined as going against God? Is God deciding to go against God actually going against God? This is a logical contradiction.

However, if God cannot sin, than he is not omnipotent, because he is unable to perform an action, negating the statement that he can do anything.


The rules and violence of the Old Testament were a product of the culture and the time.


But I thought God wrote the Bible? So he could have defined the Jewish culture however he wanted, and was also not bound to their cultural views or traditions.


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