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Lost the faith

By de-converted ~

How an all powerful and all loving GOD can allow millions of people to suffer poverty, war, despair, etc., though no fault of their own, is just beyond me. Oh, I forgot.... the one to blame is SATAN not GOD. But see, why would GOD in his unfathomable and inscrutable wisdom allow a talking SNAKE to tempt innocent Adam and Eve? If you analyze it objectively, the fall of man in GENESIS was either a well planned SET-UP to discredit man, or it happened because an UNSEARCHABLE, ALL WISE GOD was not able to anticipate the THOUGHTS AND PLANS OF SATAN.

Now that I am de-converted, I realize that I am scared and vulnerable because now I am faced with the reality that I AM ALONE. There is no HOLY SPIRIT to guide and direct my LIFE. There is no GOD or SAVIOR to SAVE me from my SINS. My mind before was conditioned to believe that somehow GOD is the ULTIMATE ARCHITECT of my life. Anything that happens, GOOD or BAD, is his will, and I have to accept it because it is an instrument to free and purify me from all defects.

There is no HOLY SPIRIT to guide and direct my LIFE.Now I am nearing middle age; my life is a mess. I am jobless. I have no money. I am poor. The BIBLE says that the poor will inherit the KINGDOM of HEAVEN, and yet there are desperate people like me everywhere, trying to knock on heaven's door that GOD enlighten my mind that I may provide for my family because they are all I have. Does the GOD of the bible provide food for the hungry? NO, people with money donate their money to the poor so that they may eat food for the day.

An ALL POWERFUL, FAITHFUL and LOVING GOD...tell that to the people who suffer everyday. Those who endure hardships, stress, violence, hopelessness, inequality... though like the first, is of no fault of their own. I have seen people who lost all their humanity because of injustices, and yet the BIBLE says there is a GOD who cares. Have you seen images of starving children in third world countries? Heaven's pavement can pay for all the starving children's food, education, clothing and housing.

I am not a CHRISTIAN any longer and yet I value the life of anyone. My life is as precious as the life of another, may it be a beggar or a king. A life is a life, it should be respected to live out its days as the owner sees fit. As long of course, that it doesn't harm any other life in the process of freedom that is chosen.

How many of you knelt down and prayed sincerely and yet was met with silence?