A holy friend?


By Cullyloden --

In a recent article, titled "Some things just don't make sense," the author made mention of God posing as a "friend" to fearful and needy believers, helping to map out their lives for them and giving assurance and justice. This makes sense and is in my estimation a common reason for religious devotion, especially Christian devotion.

From Dave's article:
"Some people need a friend, a friend that is totally in control and gives them the assurance that their lives are mapped out for them. Some people want to believe that no matter what difficulties they may face in life, all their efforts and the injustices they may endure will be lavishly rewarded or at least made right"

My "Friend," who was there to "map out" my life and make things right and comfort me in fear, was snatched away from me by religion. This friend was my most cherished mother. She was and could still be a witty, urbane, open minded and comfort giving person. A friend. My best friend... Once upon a time.

As for the last twenty-five or thirty years since her conversion at the hands of a zealous fundamentalist pastor, I could count the normal, non-Bible-quoting, non-Jesus-praising conversations I've had with her on my fingertips. Sound familiar to anyone?
In my sadness at her sudden absolute disinterest in anything non-Jesus, I tried to re-make myself.

I wanted to once again be someone to her, a real person with an interesting opinion to discuss. I changed myself from an ordinary, god-believing little boy into a balls-out, fire-breathing Christian. I did everything in my power to convert myself and any unlucky person I encountered (close friends backed off, strangers backed away). I shelved all of my science books in favor of the Bible. I stopped subscribing to any idea which was not Bible sanctioned. I even stopped composing my music and drawing my cartoons and replaced them with Jesus music and Jesus cartoons, none of which reflected my insides in any way; none of which were either lovely or funny.

I soon learned to spend most of my time feeling guilty, impotent and fearful. I wasted countless hours and days trying to imagine what hell was going to be like, so that the fear would somehow help me stop thinking "sinful" thoughts (The opposite is true; those sessions shattered my childish innocence.). None of it worked, I kept on missing my friend and we both kept on praying, praising, worrying and hurting every single day. My mom, my studies, my art, my friends, my MIND! no longer mine to cherish, vanished into the blinding, choking fog of unquestioning devotion to a cruelly silent god.

Well, I have since obviously given up on god and religion for my own self, but my rage and outrage continue and will likely do so until the day I die. Christianity and Christian fundamentalists stole all that I held dear. They stole it and I want it back!

GOOOOOOOOOd &@%$ing luck to me and to all of you others whose holy 'friend' left your hearts broken, your minds disturbed and your happy little spirits cold, confused and alone.

P.S. I expect this rant will explain some of the responses I give to preacher troll types whom I meet on this site. Or anywhere else for that matter. Any honest, well thought out Christian responses welcome, but for (your) god's sake bring your dueling pistols...


Agnosticator,5,Al Wm Johnson,3,Alegria,3,Alen Basic,1,American Apostate,3,Andrew Jasko,3,Anne R Keye,6,AnonAgno94,4,Apetivist,2,Apostate Paul,3,Articles,708,Aspieguy,12,Astreja,9,atheistnurse,10,AtheistToothFairy,1,austinrohm,3,Avangelism Project,2,Barrett Evans,2,Ben Love,69,billybee,2,BlackFreethought,12,Bob Keye,3,Bob R,4,boomSlang,1,Bore Venal Charlatan,2,Brad N,1,Brian Kellogg,8,Brisancian,3,Bruce Gerencser,1,Bruno Corey,1,C. T. Ogden,4,Carl S,377,Carol Putnam,2,Carolyn Hyppolite,10,Cecelia,4,Cheryl Ensom Dack,6,Chris Highland,2,Chris W.,1,Christian Agnostic,2,Christmas,31,ChuckyJesus,1,ConversationsWithA,1,Daniel out of the Lion's Den,15,Daniel Payne,1,Dano,17,darklady,7,Dave8,1,DealDoctor,24,Dethblight,6,dharma,4,Discordia,5,Doubting Thomas,2,Dr. Marlene Winell,25,Dr. Valerie Tarico,150,DRC,2,dswrites,2,Easter,28,EChamberlainMD,6,Ed (Teapot),2,Edward T. Babinski,1,Eric Jeffries,2,eveningmeadows,11,Evid3nc3,3,ex-Pastor Dan,19,exfundy,2,exPenty,8,Faithfool,2,Fernando Alcántar,6,freddieb42,2,freeatlast,6,G.M. Gates,2,Gary T. McDonald,2,God-O-Rama,6,Godlessgrrl,5,Greenworld,4,hellboundsoul,3,Herb,3,Houndies,3,illu minati,2,Incongruous Circumspection,11,J.W.,2,JadedAtheist,2,Jake Rhodes,3,James A. Haught,3,James C,2,James Wilhelm,9,Jazzybelle,3,Jennifer,3,Jody,3,John Draper,26,John Loftus,2,John Shores,26,Kalos,3,Karen Garst,31,Kim Anne Whittemore,1,Klym,24,Larry C,5,Larry Spencer,3,Letters,149,Libby Anne,3,Log1cd1ctat3s,2,Luke,1,lungfish,1,Merle Hertzler,1,Michael Runyan,36,Michael Sherlock,5,Mriana,17,MtlRedAtheist,1,Neal Stone,20,News,185,Nikki,1,NYdiva,2,ooglyman,2,Opinion,980,Patrice,2,Paul Hannah,1,Paul So,26,Philippe Orlando,3,Philonous,1,Politics,59,Positivist,5,psychman33,5,Rational Logic,3,Rational Okie,2,Renoliz,10,Rev Ex-Evangelist,7,RickO,3,Robert Conner,8,Ronna Russell,12,Rudy,4,Russ Hamel,2,Science,30,SeageVT,3,Shaolin,4,Simplex Munditiis,3,Son of a preacher,5,Steve Dustcircle,4,Stillunsure,4,Summerbreeze,25,Susan G. Bonella,3,Tania,22,tekHedd,2,Testimonials,1004,Thanksgiving,4,The STeWpId MoNkEy,4,TheThinkingAtheist,5,Thin-ice,4,ThinkTank,5,Tim Sledge,4,Tim Wolf,1,TinMan,1,True Anathema,4,TruthSurge,1,Ubi Dubium,4,undercover agnostic,25,unoder,7,Vadarama,2,Victor J Webster,2,Videos,102,Vyckie,10,Webmdave,9,WidePathGirl,2,WizenedSage,137,xrayman,2,xxkindofboredxx,2,Yak,9,
ExChristian.Net: A holy friend?
A holy friend?
Loaded All Posts Not found any posts VIEW ALL Read more Reply Cancel reply Delete By Home PAGES POSTS View All RECOMMENDED FOR YOU LABEL ARCHIVE SEARCH ALL POSTS Not found any post match with your request Back Home Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat January February March April May June July August September October November December Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec just now 1 minute ago $$1$$ minutes ago 1 hour ago $$1$$ hours ago Yesterday $$1$$ days ago $$1$$ weeks ago more than 5 weeks ago Followers Follow THIS PREMIUM CONTENT IS LOCKED STEP 1: Share to a social network STEP 2: Click the link on your social network Copy All Code Select All Code All codes were copied to your clipboard Can not copy the codes / texts, please press [CTRL]+[C] (or CMD+C with Mac) to copy