I don t want to be angry

By Kat ~

I am 23 years old and I am not able to be a Christian anymore after thoroughly investigating and questioning my understanding of it. I was heavily forced into non-traditional American Catholicism as a child by my parents (one a Third-Order Carmelite nun) I haven t been a Christian for years now and I thought I had worked through my feelings about it but I finished The God Delusion and some other materials on raising Christian children and I've realized how deeply ingrained it was in my childhood and how much my religious upbringing affects me in my day to day life.

I get angry now when I hear old Bible stories that remind me of being ridiculed as a child for asking questions or when my family attempts to convince me that the origins of one thing or another are Christian (Greek, Roman, Gaelic and Egyptian mythology , obviously insane claims). I have a hard time being civil in discussions with them and I feel my reactions are becoming overblown and will ultimately undermine my intent -- trying to help my family especially the younger generation understand or examine their own doubts and the wealth of evidence around us regarding blind religious fervor in general.

I have a good support system now but these people weren't indoctrinated as I was and I wouldn't mind finding out how other people deal with this sort of thing on a day to day basis. I live in a remote area without support groups or anything and I'm a mother who works full time. Any comment would be spectacular.

I used to be able to enjoy art, stories and music regardless of it s origins but I feel bitter about how I was made to feel 15 years ago and how I am treated by my family now since rejecting the concepts i was taught. I don't want to be angry, I want to be able to listen and respond to discussions in an adult manner and enjoy what I once did now for the fiction it is or the artistry of it without flashbacks or stupid psychosomatic responses -- please help...