Gullible me


By atheistnurse ~

OK. So I get the news I had the big "C." Shock, fear, and then I got religious. Doesn't everyone who has a potentially fatal diagnosis? No? Well, call me gullible. At the time it gave peace to think that a loving benevolent god was in charge and I could trust him to take care of me. I think that is religion's most powerful draw--a psychological crutch to deal with things we don't want to deal with.

Fast forward to a successful treatment. I am totally enmeshed in a church by that time. I teach Sunday school, volunteer for almost everything, lead people to the lord, home-school my kids teaching them creationism.... You get the idea. I was totally brainwashed.

Then my husband got a traumatic brain injury in an automobile accident. He went from a funny, nice guy to an angry, selfish, unpredictable, childish man. It was the hardest freaking thing I ever lived through. I prayed and prayed and prayed because it was horrible and I believed god would help my family. I mean, isn't that what the bible promises?

I never once got anything from god during that time. No answer, no signs, no help. Nada, zip, zilch. Even our church didn't do anything to help our family. No one called, visited, asked if they could do anything--nothing. But every Sunday they all told us how they were praying for us.

Prayer wasn't working. Hmmmmm. Maybe, I thought, prayer was just a way to feel really, really good about doing absolutely nothing for anyone else. I am so grateful for our heathen neighbors and family who saw we needed help and rolled up their sleeves and helped us instead of sending up a quick prayer.

It doesn't matter how much faith you have, you are not going to be moving any mountains. More faith equals more brainwashed. Oh, and the church members kept telling me how god wouldn't give me more than I could bear. If I heard that one more time I was going to hit them up beside the head with my bible. What it really meant was, "Suck it up, sister, and quit complaining."

Well, after a couple of years of this it dawned on me that there is no god. It doesn't matter how much faith you have, you are not going to be moving any mountains. More faith equals more brainwashed. I could not reconcile my reality with what the bible said. Too many inconsistencies. All the things I just took on faith because they sounded a little too hinky, really were hinky. Imagine that.

At first I was depressed because I realized my entire belief system was a hoax. Then I was a little angry because I had believed a lie. After I got over feeling foolish for believing such a load of crap in the first place, it has actually been quite liberating. I no longer have to filter things through my god-glasses. I can like my gay/buddhist/adulterer coworkers, drink that glass of wine, even check out a nice butt once in a while without an ounce of guilt.

Of course, my ex-church is still praying for me because they are convinced I am going straight to hell in a hand basket. But, evidently their god did give me more than I could bear.


Agnosticator,5,Al Wm Johnson,3,Alegria,3,Alen Basic,1,American Apostate,3,Andrew Jasko,3,Anne R Keye,6,AnonAgno94,4,Apetivist,2,Apostate Paul,3,Articles,708,Aspieguy,12,Astreja,9,atheistnurse,10,AtheistToothFairy,1,austinrohm,3,Avangelism Project,2,Barrett Evans,2,Ben Love,69,billybee,2,BlackFreethought,12,Bob Keye,3,Bob R,4,boomSlang,1,Bore Venal Charlatan,2,Brad N,1,Brian Kellogg,8,Brisancian,3,Bruce Gerencser,1,Bruno Corey,1,C. T. Ogden,4,Carl S,377,Carol Putnam,2,Carolyn Hyppolite,10,Cecelia,4,Cheryl Ensom Dack,6,Chris Highland,2,Chris W.,1,Christian Agnostic,2,Christmas,31,ChuckyJesus,1,ConversationsWithA,1,Daniel out of the Lion's Den,15,Daniel Payne,1,Dano,17,darklady,7,Dave8,1,DealDoctor,24,Dethblight,6,dharma,4,Discordia,5,Doubting Thomas,2,Dr. Marlene Winell,25,Dr. Valerie Tarico,150,DRC,2,dswrites,2,Easter,28,EChamberlainMD,6,Ed (Teapot),2,Edward T. Babinski,1,Eric Jeffries,2,eveningmeadows,11,Evid3nc3,3,ex-Pastor Dan,19,exfundy,2,exPenty,8,Faithfool,2,Fernando Alcántar,6,freddieb42,2,freeatlast,6,G.M. Gates,2,Gary T. McDonald,2,God-O-Rama,6,Godlessgrrl,5,Greenworld,4,hellboundsoul,3,Herb,3,Houndies,3,illu minati,2,Incongruous Circumspection,11,J.W.,2,JadedAtheist,2,Jake Rhodes,3,James A. Haught,3,James C,2,James Wilhelm,9,Jazzybelle,3,Jennifer,3,Jody,3,John Draper,26,John Loftus,2,John Shores,26,Kalos,3,Karen Garst,31,Kim Anne Whittemore,1,Klym,24,Larry C,5,Larry Spencer,3,Letters,149,Libby Anne,3,Log1cd1ctat3s,2,Luke,1,lungfish,1,Merle Hertzler,1,Michael Runyan,36,Michael Sherlock,5,Mriana,17,MtlRedAtheist,1,Neal Stone,20,News,185,Nikki,1,NYdiva,2,ooglyman,2,Opinion,980,Patrice,2,Paul Hannah,1,Paul So,26,Philippe Orlando,3,Philonous,1,Politics,59,Positivist,5,psychman33,5,Rational Logic,3,Rational Okie,2,Renoliz,10,Rev Ex-Evangelist,7,RickO,3,Robert Conner,8,Ronna Russell,12,Rudy,4,Russ Hamel,2,Science,30,SeageVT,3,Shaolin,4,Simplex Munditiis,3,Son of a preacher,5,Steve Dustcircle,4,Stillunsure,4,Summerbreeze,25,Susan G. Bonella,3,Tania,22,tekHedd,2,Testimonials,1004,Thanksgiving,4,The STeWpId MoNkEy,4,TheThinkingAtheist,5,Thin-ice,4,ThinkTank,5,Tim Sledge,4,Tim Wolf,1,TinMan,1,True Anathema,4,TruthSurge,1,Ubi Dubium,4,undercover agnostic,25,unoder,7,Vadarama,2,Victor J Webster,2,Videos,102,Vyckie,10,Webmdave,9,WidePathGirl,2,WizenedSage,137,xrayman,2,xxkindofboredxx,2,Yak,9,
ExChristian.Net: Gullible me
Gullible me
Loaded All Posts Not found any posts VIEW ALL Read more Reply Cancel reply Delete By Home PAGES POSTS View All RECOMMENDED FOR YOU LABEL ARCHIVE SEARCH ALL POSTS Not found any post match with your request Back Home Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat January February March April May June July August September October November December Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec just now 1 minute ago $$1$$ minutes ago 1 hour ago $$1$$ hours ago Yesterday $$1$$ days ago $$1$$ weeks ago more than 5 weeks ago Followers Follow THIS PREMIUM CONTENT IS LOCKED STEP 1: Share to a social network STEP 2: Click the link on your social network Copy All Code Select All Code All codes were copied to your clipboard Can not copy the codes / texts, please press [CTRL]+[C] (or CMD+C with Mac) to copy