Skip to main content

Giving up my Favorite Blanket

By Kremer ~

When I first dropped Christianity, it was because of the shear nonreason that religion seemed to display: the ease at which I knew others religion to be false taught me that my own was as well. This observation was made when I was lying in bed trying to sleep, when all of my doubts creep out and haunt me. All of my worries and all of my stresses are amplified at night for whatever reason. Most of my "Enlightenment" moments would either occur during those times, or when I would obsessively pace for hours on end talking to myself.

After I made the conclusion that Christianity was probably false, I became a Theistic Agnostic. I was really torn up about it, after all, there was so many years of falsehoods I had believed in?

It wasn't terrible though. I lived in a family of religious moderates, not crazy Fundamentalists. Science was open to me, and me and my family had political and philosophical discussions that would go on for ages. As a kindergartner, I had believed in a literal interpretation of Genesis. Then I heard of things like evolution and the big bang. I was always a Naturalist it would seem; when I natural explanation was given, the bible was dropped.

I was one of those weird kids who had very little friends and who would rather watch educational television than play soccer; and so I did. I would watch something like five or six hours a day for years. From second grade to eighth grade. As you can imagine, I acquired an impressive intellect about myself.

I had never had many friends and was tormented by my peers constantly for my social awkwardness. Later, I was tormented because it was discovered that I had High Functioning Autism, which most people lack the ability to distinguish between Full Autism. My knowledge and my ability to solve intellectual problems was the only thing that gave me self esteem. So I learned more.

Moving forward again though, my abandoning of Christianity wasn't terrible. Sure, I cried for a little bit. There was the fear of what would happen after I died, and I grappled with that for awhile.

To help grapple with it, I googled some weird thing and found this place. I read through a lot of the post and the comments, and found a reference to Zeitgeist, with the claim that it would explain a lot of it.

I realized Jesus was just some pagan rehashing of Judaism, which was itself a rehashing of a particular bread of Egyptian paganism that only lasted until King Tutankhamen ascended the thrown.

Now broken from my last ties to Christianity, I had no reason to believe in god. I suppose the idea that Jesus was a historical figure was all that kept me from Atheism. I guess I still had a bit of attachment to it... lol.

I became angry at all of the nonsense in the world. It wasn't a burning, heat of the moment, kind of anger. It was a calm, logical, and cold sort of anger, not quite hate. It was because of this that I began to debate the worst of the bunch: the Fundamentalists.

Weeks upon weeks of debating them, and with the help of the other Atheists who happened to be there, I learned more about evolution and what science is than I had for those years of educational television that had come previously. The best way to understand science is to understand pseudoscience.

It seemed like each day I found another reason to not believe in god. Another fallacy, another atrocity, another lack of reason, and more disbelief.

Eventually, I realized that Zeitgeist is a bunch of crap made by a crazy conspiracy theorist spouting half-truths, much like the fundamentalists, and I dropped that reason for Atheism. I had all of the other reasons though now.

I hear many people agonizing about how much of their lives they lost to religion. For me, I'm glad to say it wasn't like that. I wouldn't have wanted myself to give up religion earlier, but I wouldn't have wanted to lose it later either. My faith wasn't crushed by some outside source, leaving me vulnerable and without direct. I crushed it. I left it when I was ready.

It was like a favorite blanket. As a little kid, I would not have wanted it taken from me. I'm glad I had it. As I got older though, I matured, and I gave it up when I was ready. It was never ripped from me. On that regard I am lucky.


Popular posts from this blog

Are You an Atheist Success Story?

By Avangelism Project ~ F acts don’t spread. Stories do. It’s how (good) marketing works, it’s how elections (unfortunately) are won and lost, and it’s how (all) religion spreads. Proselytization isn’t accomplished with better arguments. It’s accomplished with better stories and it’s time we atheists catch up. It’s not like atheists don’t love a good story. Head over to the atheist reddit and take a look if you don’t believe me. We’re all over stories painting religion in a bad light. Nothing wrong with that, but we ignore the value of a story or a testimonial when we’re dealing with Christians. We can’t be so proud to argue the semantics of whether atheism is a belief or deconversion is actually proselytization. When we become more interested in defining our terms than in affecting people, we’ve relegated ourselves to irrelevance preferring to be smug in our minority, but semantically correct, nonbelief. Results Determine Reality The thing is when we opt to bury our

So Just How Dumb Were Jesus’ Disciples? The Resurrection, Part VII.

By Robert Conner ~ T he first mention of Jesus’ resurrection comes from a letter written by Paul of Tarsus. Paul appears to have had no interest whatsoever in the “historical” Jesus: “even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, we know him so no longer.” ( 2 Corinthians 5:16 ) Paul’s surviving letters never once mention any of Jesus’ many exorcisms and healings, the raising of Lazarus, or Jesus’ virgin birth, and barely allude to Jesus’ teaching. For Paul, Jesus only gets interesting after he’s dead, but even here Paul’s attention to detail is sketchy at best. For instance, Paul says Jesus “was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures” ( 1 Corinthians 15:4 ), but there are no scriptures that foretell the Jewish Messiah would at long last appear only to die at the hands of Gentiles, much less that the Messiah would then be raised from the dead after three days. After his miraculous conversion on the road to Damascus—an event Paul never mentions in his lette

Christian TV presenter reads out Star Wars plot as story of salvation

An email prankster tricked the host of a Christian TV show into reading out the plots of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Star Wars in the belief they were stories of personal salvation. The unsuspecting host read out most of the opening rap to The Fresh Prince, a 1990s US sitcom starring Will Smith , apparently unaware that it was not a genuine testimony of faith. The prankster had slightly adapted the lyrics but the references to a misspent youth playing basketball in West Philadelphia would have been instantly familiar to most viewers. The lines read out by the DJ included: "One day a couple of guys who were up to no good starting making trouble in my living area. I ended up getting into a fight, which terrified my mother." The presenter on Genesis TV , a British Christian channel, eventually realised that he was being pranked and cut the story short – only to move on to another spoof email based on the plot of the Star Wars films. It began: &quo


By David Andrew Dugle ~   S ettle down now children, here's the story from the Book of David called The Parable of the Bent Cross. In the land Southeast of Eden –  Eden, Minnesota that is – between two rivers called the Big Miami and the Little Miami, in the name of Saint Gertrude there was once built a church. Here next to it was also built a fine parochial school. The congregation thrived and after a multitude of years, a new, bigger church was erected, well made with clean straight lines and a high steeple topped with a tall, thin cross of gold. The faithful felt proud, but now very low was their money. Their Sunday offerings and school fees did not suffice. Anon, they decided to raise money in an unclean way. One fine summer day the faithful erected tents in the chariot lot between the two buildings. In the tents they set up all manner of games – ring toss, bingo, little mechanical racing horses and roulette wheels – then all who lived in the land between the two rivers we

Morality is not a Good Argument for Christianity

By austinrohm ~ I wrote this article as I was deconverting in my own head: I never talked with anyone about it, but it was a letter I wrote as if I was writing to all the Christians in my life who constantly brought up how morality was the best argument for Christianity. No Christian has read this so far, but it is written from the point of view of a frustrated closeted atheist whose only outlet was organizing his thoughts on the keyboard. A common phrase used with non-Christians is: “Well without God, there isn’t a foundation of morality. If God is not real, then you could go around killing and raping.” There are a few things which must be addressed. 1. Show me objective morality. Define it and show me an example. Different Christians have different moral standards depending on how they interpret the Bible. Often times, they will just find what they believe, then go back into scripture and find a way to validate it. Conversely, many feel a particular action is not

Why I left the Canadian Reformed Church

By Chuck Eelhart ~ I was born into a believing family. The denomination is called Canadian Reformed Church . It is a Dutch Calvinistic Christian Church. My parents were Dutch immigrants to Canada in 1951. They had come from two slightly differing factions of the same Reformed faith in the Netherlands . Arriving unmarried in Canada they joined the slightly more conservative of the factions. It was a small group at first. Being far from Holland and strangers in a new country these young families found a strong bonding point in their church. Deutsch: Heidelberger Katechismus, Druck 1563 (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) I was born in 1955 the third of eventually 9 children. We lived in a small southern Ontario farming community of Fergus. Being young conservative and industrious the community of immigrants prospered. While they did mix and work in the community almost all of the social bonding was within the church group. Being of the first generation born here we had a foot in two