By Valerie Tarico ~ Don't want a therapist who thinks the solution to your depression is Jesus? Here’s some advice from clinical psychologist , Dr. Caleb Lack. M ore Americans than ever are leaving their religion. Many find the process liberating, but it also can bring social and emotional challenges. A husband and wife may find themselves unexpectedly on opposite sides of the faith divide, struggling with what to tell their children. A college student may hide her doubts at home for fear of being cut off emotionally or financially, and then feel like she is living a lie. But trying to get help sorting things out can bring challenges of its own, like ending up with a therapist who thinks that the way to solve your problems is by returning to your old religion—or hers. Clinical psychologist, Caleb Lack , is the director of the Secular Therapist Project. I asked him to talk about his experiences and how people who are questioning or leaving their faith can find support or m...

By Valerie Tarico ~ Janet Heimlich V alerie Tarico interviews Janet Heimlich , author of Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment . During eight years working for NPR, Heimlich never shied away from controversial topics. She won nine journalism awards, in part by doggedly exposing injustices in the death penalty and prison systems. Most recently she made her way behind another set of locked doors, into the inner sanctums of authoritarian religious communities. Tarico: What got you focused on such a hot potato of a topic? Heimlich: I came upon the idea rather gradually. As a first-time mother at the age of 41, I first simply became focused on children’s issues, such as compassionate parenting. I then started to notice high-profile stories in the news, such as the child sexual abuse scandal in the Catholic Church. One week in 2008 was particularly poignant: The pope came to the U.S. and spoke publicly about the scandal for the first time; meanwhile, aut...

By Mriana ~ I t is sometimes strange how we figure out what things/issues give our lives meaning. I think I found out the hard way recently, but I am rather content on that aspect now, especially after a short email conversation I had Wednesday morning. I received an email that morning from Valerie Tarico , who has given me inspiration in many ways, even helped/helps me on my journey in recovering from religion and this time was no exception. She said, "Thank you again for all of the encouragement and support you provide to the exChristian community. So many people have been buoyed and encouraged by your words!" I not only thanked her for that and told her I really needed those kind words right about now, but I ended up dumping on her a little, in part because I know she won't repeat what I told her and because I trust her. Recently, someone inquired of me something to this effect, “If religion is meaningless to you, why do you still talk about it, among many ot...

By Valerie Tarico ~ J ustin Griffith is a twenty-eight year old active duty soldier, a sergeant at Fort Bragg in North Carolina . He is also a new dad. Griffith likes what he does. He describes the military as a place that has structure, discipline, and opportunities. From his point of view, he has a full life, and a good one. And yet it was Griffith, as much anyone, who blew open the U.S. Army ’s Spiritual Fitness program this winter. Why? Why make waves in a job you love among people you respect? Why risk the pariah status that is so often the lot of whistleblowers? Griffith agreed to let me ask him those questions. Justin Griffith Tarico: I’m impressed that you got permission to talk publicly about the Spiritual Fitness Program. Griffith: Well, I need to say that I am speaking as Sgt. Justin Griffith. I am not representing the army in any official way. I’m free to talk about my opinions and experiences related to the mandatory soldier fitness tracker, how “Spiritual Fitne...

By Ronna Russell ~ A few years ago, in a haze of post-divorce pain, I began blogging about my childhood experiences growing up in the United Pentecostal Church and submitted some of those posts here on Ex-Christian. I was astounded at the support and understanding I received. Several regular readers encouraged me to consider writing a book. So I did. (An excerpt follows.)  Valerie Tarico, author of Trusting Doubt , was kind enough to read my manuscript and write a review: Caught between the archaic religious dictates of her Pentecostal family and the complexities of the world outside, Ronna Russell fights for survival and more in  The Uncomfortable Confessions of a Preacher’s Kid .  Loneliness, raw sexuality, unexpected kindness and cruelty, and through it all an understated endurance with solid granite at the core, Russell’s memoir is alternately hard, hungry, raw, and tender--like sex and love and parenthood and simply being. I sat down to read the first chapt...

By Valerie Tarico ~ Religion is just one part of the lethal cocktail, but it is a powerful intoxicant. T he year 2015 has opened to slaughter in the name of gods. In Paris, two Islamist brothers executed Charlie Hebdo cartoonists “in defense of the Prophet,” while an associate killed shoppers in a kosher grocery. In Nigeria, Islamist members of Boko Haram massacred a town to cries of Allahu Akbar— Allah is the greatest! Simultaneously, the United Nations released a report detailing the “ethnic cleansing” of Muslims in the Central African Republic by Christian militias, sometimes reciting Bible verses. On a more civilized note, Saudi Arabia began inflicting 1000 lashes on a jailed blasphemous blogger—to be doled out over 20 weeks so that he may survive to the end. In media outlets around the world, fierce debate has erupted over who or what is responsible. Is monotheism inherently violent? Is religion an excuse or cover for other kinds of conflict? Are Western colonialis...