I went to a Christian school from kindergarten to 8th grade. At one point, I wanted to go to a Christian university and become a pastor. For high school, I went to a public school, but I was still a Christian all throughout high school. During college I was exposed to a lot of different type of religions. I was really interested to learn about the difference in all the different type of religions. The more I learned about religion, the more I disagreed with all religion in general.
Religion has caused more wars and killed more people than anything else in history. The god in the bible, is a very angry, jealous, and vindictive person. Is it just me or is the Old Testament just talk about war after war? God telling Abraham to kill his own son as a test; who does that? I feel like no one questions anything in the Bible. Whenever you ask a pastor anything they can't answer, they would say you just have to have faith. When science proves that earth took billions of years to create, a pastor would say when God said seven days, the days were actually longer back then. Pastor treat everybody like children. That's an excuse you would say to a kid, but even a kid thinks that is a bullshit answer.
Most religion uses fear to keep their followers in line. Hell is the ultimate fear they use on people. All you have to do is believe that Christ died for you and you will go to heaven. You could sin all your life and on your deathbed be scared of dying and call out to Jesus to save you and you will go to heaven. That's bullshit. That's how you get all these fake and immoral people at church. A week of sin and then act all fake in church or like Catholics who sin all week long and then ask for forgiveness, and then everything is all good again. Bullshit. How is it fair for people like this to go heaven, but a person who has done good all their lives, not go to heaven, because they choose not to believe in you. That is very egotistical god in my opinion.
Why does everything have to be about faith? When anybody in real life wants you to just have faith and prove nothing to you; you can bet it's a scam. If God is real, He should make himself known. How is it fair that He reveals himself to Moses, Abraham, and all the other people in the bible, but not reveal himself to anybody else? They got an unfair advantage; they got to see You. Of course it's easier for them to believe in You. If You reveal yourself to me, I would have the opportunity to believe in You too. Everything about religion sounds like a scam, but people choose to believe it anyway.
How is it fair to have a god that takes all the glory for when something good happens, but doesn't take any of the blame something bad happens like when a child gets raped, tortured, and killed? A pastor would say it's God's will; there is a reason for everything. No, there is no reason or a bright side to any child getting raped, tortured, or killed. To me, if You take the glory, You should shoulder the blame as well. I would rather believe that God created everything, but He is not responsible for any of the good or bad. Everything is just random; shit happens. Shit happens is a much better explanation to me than that there is a reason for everything. But, I guess it comforts most people. I'd rather have a real answer, I guess.
I finally understood why we have religion. It's here to comfort people. Nobody likes to feel alone or know there is nothing after death. It's nice to believe there is something after death; a place where you could see everybody you love again. That sounds nice, and people are willing to believe in anything to be part of that. I just decided not to lie to myself anymore. I didn't completely feel this way, and wasn't able to say it out loud until a few years into my marriage. My wife is a Christian and would never want to talk to me about atheism. The day I revealed that I don't believe in God anymore, I was so afraid she would leave me. She didn't leave me; she loves me, but will not ever want to talk to me about it. I felt relieved to say it out loud. I didn't want to lie to my wife anymore.
We are now having our first child. Is it weird that I want to raise my kid in Christianity? And probably go to the same Christian school I went to growing up? Not because my wife wants to, but I want to as well. I think religion does have many good points and does instill a lot of good moral and behaviors growing up. But, when they get older and are able to make their own decisions, I will have a talk with them and give them different viewpoints. Whatever they decide is up to them.
I hate that being atheist is looked upon so badly. People automatically think you are immoral and they can't trust you. First of all, trust is earned. I wouldn't just trust a Christian, Catholic, Jew, or Scientologist right off the bat. No matter what belief a person has, it doesn't mean you could trust them. Trust needs to be earned. You could give people benefit of the doubt, but complete trust comes further down the line. People can tell everybody that they are gay in public, but when you say you’re an atheist it's okay for them to say your wrong. I still wouldn't publicly say I'm atheist. I could only see it hurting me and hot helping me at all. I guess the gays can come out of the closet, but I have to keep my beliefs in the closet still. People will pre-judge you. Even if they don’t say anything to your face, they will definitely think of you differently, which is very unfair.
I honestly feel that I am a much more fair and considerate person than the average religious person. I’m no saint, but I believe I would make a better decision than 90% of the population. I live my life by treating everybody with respect and helping out people that can't help themselves. My moral compass is pretty good, not perfect. If I saw someone drop a suitcase filled with money, and no one else was around, and I knew for sure I won't get in trouble for keeping it, I would keep the money. I believe anybody else that says that he or she wouldn't is lying. They are just saying that because it's a hypothetical question. If it really happens, the person who said they wouldn’t would actually take the money faster than the person who said yes in the first place. I believe that is an honest answer that only a few people can admit to. Anybody that can answer this question honestly, can get along with me, and we would probably agree on a lot of topics.
I could of written so much more, but I think this is good place to stop. It felt really good to write all this down. I welcome any feedback. Thanks for taking your time to read what I have to say.
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