4/04/2004 | Share this article: View Commentssent in by Formerfundie
I guess now is as good a time as any to submit this. It takes a certain amount of courage and I hope there are individuals here that can relate, and that there are ones that might read this that will be helped and encouraged.
I was a Christian all my life, since I can remember. I grew up Catholic. There was never any reason for me to think there was not God, that’s all I ever knew. Even when I got older and had an episode where I was involved in Scientology, I still thought there was God, I had no reason not to, and even though I was in that cult, they encouraged anyone who was still going to church to keep going, regardless of what it was, so that never had any effect on me changing my mind. It actually had more of a reinforcing effect because while I was involved in the Church of Scientology I had what I thought at the time was an “out of body” experience. It terrified me, although I did get a lot of attention from the other “church” members at the time. They encouraged delusions of all kinds and considered the “experience” beneficial as it was supposed to somehow be indicative of getting closer to a “clear mind.” This experience happened due to stress and duress and I now know that it was a psychological reaction to blatant mental abuse I was going through at the time. It is where a victim can’t handle what’s happening at the moment so the person shuts his or her mind down and escapes to “another place” in the mind. This is a dark place, much like when an alcoholic has a blackout. I suppose because I was inclined towards and constantly exposed to spirituality I allowed myself to be open to mystical types of occurrences, and I had them. I had them in Scientology. I had them while participating in New Age types of things, and I of course, had them in Christianity. I was what most would call a “seeker”, and my lifelong pursuit seems to always have been a search for truth. As I got older I went from sect to sect of Christianity looking for where I fit. I went from Catholic to Assembly of God, to Methodist, to Lutheran, and when I met my soon to be ex-husband – he was involved in what would be referred to now as “New Age” – he also believed in ET’s and well, what can I say, I was a sucker for such things. What is it I’ve read here about, “If you’ll believe the bible, then you’ll believe anything.” It goes something like that anyway. Well, point made.
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